Someone to Watch Over Me
by horseaholic
Summary: Fraser and Ray find a woman in the aftermath of being raped. After the investigation, Fraser becomes close to her and neglects his other duties. FraserOC. Fraser/Ray V friendship. Please R&R!
1. Rescue Me

Author's Note: Hey everybody. This is my first venture into Due South fan fiction. If the characters are OOC in any way, I have a pretty good excuse. I watched the show when I was about 5, when it originally aired, until I was about 9 when it ended, and this summer, my dad bought all the seasons DVDs off Ebay and we have been watching them ever since, enjoying every minute of Paul Gross clashing hilariously with David Marciano. I have to admit that, as much as I've tried to change my mind, Callum Rennie's Stanley 'Ray' Kowalski is not my Ray Vecchio, and never will be. There have been moments where I havfe been impressed with him, but I am just far too heavily attached to David Marciano's portrayal of Ray to ever consider Callum's portrayal to be my Ray. Sorry, that's just the truth. Hope that doesn't turn anyone off from the story.

I finally found a fitting title, which is all I've been waiting for before posting, as the story content itself was finished, needing only some editing. Please be nice in reviews, as it's my first time writing Due South fan fiction and I'm trying my very best to make it a good story. So far, in my opinion, it is. I'm going to disclaim something right now: I apologize for any geographical, etc. errors, as I am only familiar with New York City on the East Coast (I'm from North Dakota, familiarity of Chicago and other such huge cities shouldn't be expected of me.) If you readers wish to correct me, or especially, help me out with any of this, that would be much appreciated. Plus, I'm one of those people who, with every new fan fiction category I try, I get excited over like, two reviews. Also, I do a second author note at the end of many of my chapters, and they should at least be glanced at, as they may contain things like information about future updates and such, just so you know.

Thanks to Niento-Zero for being my beta, my bouncer of ideas, and my editor, too. Already, your notes and words are helping so much.

Enjoy the story.

**Chapter 1 - Someone to Watch Over Me**

Amanda Collins walked nervously down the street, hardly containing her anxiety. Before she'd come to Chicago for school, she'd never been to Chicago before. She had started out at Rutgers University in New Brunswick, New Jersey, a theatre major. 25 years old, of medium height, with brown highlighted hair and vivid green eyes, she was just finishing her first semester of graduate school at the University of Illinois at Chicago, and was on her way back to her apartment after a movie with some friends.

She'd told them to go on ahead, that she would catch up after giving her boyfriend back home, Alexander, a phone call.

But she always paced when she spoke on the phone, and in hearing his voice, she'd spaced out where she was, or how to get back.

Now she was lost and quickly getting cold and scared.

She paused by an unfamiliar alleyway, with apartment complexes right next to it, when all of a sudden, a gunshot rang out. Amanda screamed as she felt a hot, fierce pain in her side, and she fell to the ground. Hot tears of pain flooded her eyes, so she could barely see three men come out of the darkness. Ignoring her screams of pain and terror, they dragged her into the alley, stuffed a sock into her mouth so she couldn't scream, and raped her.

When the attack was over, the three men left her lying there. For several moments, she couldn't move. It was even hard to breathe. She was losing blood and afraid she would go into shock.

She did know she was going to need help, if she wasn't going to die— she didn't want to die.

Although in excruciating pain, Amanda crawled to the end of the alleyway. She managed to get to her knees and pull herself to her feet, her fingernails digging into the side of the brick building. She almost passed out in pain, but managed to remain conscious. Slowly, she walked toward the nearest apartment complex.

Three floors above her, Amanda did not know that Benton Fraser had heard the shot.

* * *

Benton Fraser looked up suddenly from playing cards with Ray Vecchio, as he heard a gunshot.

"Ray," he said, "did you hear that?"

"Hear what?" Ray asked irritably, frustrated that Ben was stalling his win of the game.

"There was a gunshot."

"Benny, this is Chicago," Ray said. "You and I can't go responding to every gunshot we hear, especially when we're off-duty, or we'd never have any peace and quiet."

"But Ray, we are the police. It's our job to respond to something like that."

"But we're off-duty, Fraser."

"Well, it was right below us, so I'm going. You can come if you want. Diefenbaker," Fraser beckoned to the wolf, who jumped up and followed him.

Ray looked around at the sound of the door closing. "Fraser!" he yelled, and he slapped down his cards. "Ugh, and I was about to win, too!"

But as usual, he ran after Fraser.

Fraser bolted down the fire escape stairs, jumping half the last flight. Then he froze, listening.

"Fraser, what's going—?" Ray began, but Fraser shushed him.

"Shh, Ray, I'm trying to listen. There's someone here," he said.

"Fraser, we heard the echo of a gunshot. In Chicago, that could be twenty blocks away," Ray whined.

Suddenly, Diefenbaker barked and started to run toward the end of the street. "No," Fraser said, "it's this way."

He followed the wolf around the corner and found Diefenbaker licking Amanda in the face. Amanda was struggling to push Diefenbaker off, her face pale from pain.

"Diefenbaker," Fraser said to the wolf, and he backed away.

Amanda looked up at Fraser and Ray through pained, scared, humiliated eyes.

"Oh, my God, what happened?" Ray asked immediately. "What's your name?"

"Amanda Collins," Amanda gasped at him.

"Ray, now is not the best time for interrogations," Fraser said. He noticed the blood on the pavement and staining Amanda's clothes. "She's been shot. She needs a hospital."

"OK, I'm calling an ambulance," Ray said, flipping out his cell phone.

"No, Ray, I believe it would be faster if we just take her ourselves, as we have no actual address of this alley to give to the EMTs," Fraser suggested.

"OK, OK, fine, let's get her to help. But no bleeding on my seats," Ray said.

Amanda shot Fraser a terrified look as he began to pick her up to carry her. She wanted to struggle and fight him off, but she was too weak, so she let him pick her up. Then, as he had her in his arms and began to walk away, she passed out.

"We have to hurry, Ray," Fraser said, looking at Ray. "And whatever you do, when we get back to your car, don't elevate her legs to treat for shock; her wound is above the waist."

Ray nodded and took off running. With Amanda unconscious in her arms, Fraser kept close behind.

* * *

Fraser chewed on the inside of his cheek as he waited in the waiting room with Ray for any news of the girl. He wondered if she had made it through the surgery. He realized he didn't know her name. He knew nothing whatsoever about her. If she died, how would he notify any of her family?

Fraser and Ray stood as a doctor came out and beckoned to them.

"Is she all right?" Fraser asked immediately.

"We think she's going to make it," the doctor said. "But as you are not family, I cannot say much to you, due to doctor-patient confidentiality, except to tell you her name was Amanda."

Fraser nodded, but Ray looked annoyed. "Even though we're the ones who rescued her, you can't tell us anything?" he demanded.

"Well, yes, that's the rule, Ray," Fraser said, looking at him, and he launched into explanation about doctor-patient confidentiality. "Doctor-patient confidentiality is a fundamental right given to every patient admitted to any hospital for any reason, guaranteed by the Fifth and Fourteenth Amendments in the U.S. Constitution. It protects against unwarranted invasions of privacy by federal or state entities— including you and I, no matter the circumstances. An example of that would be _Roe versus Wade _in 1973. The patient themselves— in this case, Amanda— has to give specific consent to Doctor Storm, and as she is unconscious at the moment, she cannot, so the doctor-patient confidentiality law is still in place, and we can't do anything to change that—"

"Fraser, I know about _Row versus Wade_," Ray growled, glaring at him. "And you're not supposed to know about those things, you're Canadian." Fraser looked at him, very surprised at this remark. "OK, never mind, but I don't care about that law. I just want to know if we did what we did for a good reason."

"Once Amanda regains consciousness, I will ask her if I can give you, Constable, Detective Vecchio, and her parents any information," Doctor Storm said. "Not even her parents can know what happened to her until then. All I can tell you is that I will call you when she does give me permission."

Fraser and Ray sighed deeply. It was almost as though they had completely wasted the past ten minutes of their time. But they could do nothing else. All they could do was nod and Doctor Storm saw them out, and they left.

* * *

The next morning, Ray was woken early by the phone ringing. He rolled over, still half-asleep, and answered it.

"Hello?"

"Is this Detective Ray Vecchio?"

"Yeah, it is; who's this and why are you calling so early on a Saturday?" Ray asked.

"This is Doctor Victor Storm, Detective. I'm calling on behalf of Amanda Collins from Northwestern Memorial Hospital."

Ray looked at the clock on his nightstand. It was 7:30. "Oh yeah, right, what about her?" he asked, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes and sitting up in bed.

"Well, she stabilized last night, and I thought perhaps you and Constable Fraser would like to see her and talk to her, pending an investigation," said Doctor Storm. "We've decided to transfer her early to a private room and I will ask her before you get here if I have her permission to give out information about her incident, so you and Constable Fraser know what you're dealing with and how you can help her and the investigation."

"Oh yeah, sure, we can do that," Ray said. "She's OK enough for it?"

"Well, I cannot speak for her personally, but physically, she's well enough," Doctor Storm said. "She is going to stay another 24 hours for observation, due to her LOC, but that doesn't mean you can't come talk to her. After that, she will be given pain medication, strict resting instructions, and sent discharged."

"You're not sending her all the way back to Kentucky?" Ray asked, surprised.

"No, Detective, I must insist she stays in Chicago, even though the men who attacked her are still out there," the doctor said. "Would you mind coming in? We can talk about this all more here. Her parents will be coming in this morning around ten; her boyfriend, too."

"OK, I'll call Fraser and we can be there in… an hour?" Ray said.

"Very good, Detective, see you soon," Doctor Storm said, and he hung up.

Ray dialed Fraser. "Fraser, get ready. I'm going to pick you up and we're going to Northwestern to see Amanda in an hour."

* * *

Doctor Storm met Fraser and Ray in the waiting room, and he led them to room 430. Fraser had left Diefenbaker in the car after an explanation from Ray that animals were not allowed in hospitals.

"She did give me permission to tell you, her parents, and Alexander what came of our examination. First of all, you need to know we found fluids, so there's a possibility Amanda could have been infected with HIV or a different STD," Doctor Storm said.

Fraser and Ray's hearts sank. That news would destroy Amanda.

"We're giving her medication to help prevent the infection of HIV right now," Doctor Storm said, "but there's no guarantee. We still need her to be checked for DNA and such, but her personal physical health was of the utmost importance over the investigation."

Fraser and Ray nodded.

"Oh, and it might not be best to talk to her about that just yet, if you please. If we don't, she will remain calmer. In here," Doctor Storm said, opening the door to room 430.

Amanda was sitting up in her hospital bed, playing Mario Brothers on the Nintendo set on her lap, the TV suspended above her bed. At some point in one of the levels, her character— Mario, judging by all the red— fell into a hole and she lost the game.

"Damn it!" she exclaimed irritably. Then she caught sight of Fraser, Ray, and the doctor and she blushed and sighed. "Not more cops?" she asked.

"We need to ask you what happened, Amanda, so you can make a statement," Doctor Storm said.

Amanda shrugged and immediately regretted that motion. It hurt to move like that.

Fraser stepped forward and removed his hat. "Amanda, I'm Constable Benton Fraser, Royal Canadian Mounted Police."

"You're a mountie?" Amanda asked. She eyed his red suit. Fraser nodded. "So, uh, where's your horse?"

"Well, you see, that's a common misconception nowadays," Fraser explained. "We only ride anymore for special occasions. It's—"

"What he means is, it's hard to keep up with something that has 250 horsepower with only one," Ray interrupted, his tone sarcastic, a cheesy grin plastered on his face.

Fraser considered that for a moment, and then nodded and was silent.

"Detective Ray Vecchio, Chicago PD," Ray went on, suddenly very business-like, showing Amanda his badge. "We've come to ask you a few questions. You up for it?"

Amanda nodded. "I guess so," she said.

"Before the attack last night, where were you and where were you going?" Ray asked.

"I was walking back to my apartment with some friends," Amanda said.

"You're a student here?"

"Graduate school. I'm a student at the University of Illinois at Chicago, theatre, Shakespearean concentration. I graduated from Rutgers University with a theatre performance and stage management degree."

"OK. Then what happened?"

"I called my boyfriend back home, Alexander. I told my friends to go on ahead. But I always pace when I talk on the phone, and I didn't pay attention to where I was going. I guess I got lost. It was raining and I was getting cold. But I didn't call Alex or my parents or anybody, because I didn't want them to worry. They live in Kentucky, which is pretty far from here. I don't want them to know, though, so I guess I have no one." She closed her eyes, recalling the events in her mind. She breathed deeply to keep herself calm. "It only got worse when I heard a gunshot."

"That shot hit you."

"Obviously; it was the only shot I heard."

"We checked the scene out after you were admitted and found some DNA samples that may lead us to who attacked you," Ray said. "But we also need you to go through a few tests to see if there's any DNA on you."

"It was three men. You'll find the three men that attacked me in a city of what, five million?" Amanda asked him.

"We'll do our best. We'll bring you down to the station to identify the men with a sketch artist as soon as possible," Ray said. "We want to catch these guys."

"OK."

"Is there anything else you'd like to tell me about the attack? Like, what happened after the guys hit you?" Ray asked. He knew what was coming.

What he didn't know was how Amanda reacted to the question. She began to panic and cry surprisingly quickly.

"Amanda?" he asked, remaining serious, while feeling sorry for her at the same time.

Amanda wiped her eyes and stifled a sob. "Then they raped me. I'm sorry," she said, looking at him, embarrassed. "It's just hard, you know? I mean, I came here to finish school. I don't goof off a lot because I want to concentrate on my studies and do well here, so I can graduate as soon as possible and be done with my education. I don't party or drink or smoke or do drugs or anything like that; I prefer to read or watch movies with friends. I never attracted unwanted attention; at least I don't think I did. Why would they do this to me? I was so damn stupid to go off on my own like that in such an unfamiliar, huge city."

"Amanda, you're not stupid," Ray said. "You've been a victim of a random act of violence, a crime. We're going to do our best to get these bastards who attacked you behind bars. Until we do, you'll be in protective custody."

"Are you going to arrest me?" Amanda asked, looking up at him and Fraser.

"No, that's not how it works," Ray said, smiling at her. "It's just protection, not arrest."

"How?" Amanda asked.

Ray turned and looked at Fraser. "Fraser is going to look after you," he said brightly.

Fraser looked at Ray. "M-me, Ray?" he stammered, surprised.

"Yes, Fraser, you, there's no use arguing. I'm going to go talk to Welsh right now and make sure he's OK with it. And I have to get through to the Dragon Lady as well, while I'm at it," Ray said, his tone of voice suddenly bright. "She'll stay with you at your place."

Fraser gulped. He'd only once ever been assigned to protect someone: the Canadian trade diplomat's daughter, who had been 16 at the time, and he hadn't had the best time of it, either.

Ray wouldn't quit looking at him with that cheesy, cheery grin plastered on his face. "Well, all right, Ray," Fraser conceded.

"Good, it's settled then," Ray said happily, smiling. "Fraser, you stay with Amanda. Maybe ask a few more questions. I'm going to go talk to Welsh. I'll be back."

Fraser and Amanda both watched Ray leave the room. Then they both looked at each other, confused.

Amanda shrugged, unconcerned, and then winced from the pain.

"You'd best take it easy," Fraser said. "I'll stay, but you're going to rest."

Amanda sighed and winced again. Her broken ribs really hurt. "OK," she gave in. "But look, if you don't want to do this, you don't have to. I'm not a child. I don't want my parents to know what happened to me, because they'll just freak out on me, but if they get notified, then they'll come here and will insist on taking care of me, even though I'm an adult and I've been living on my own for years now. Alex will worry, but he'll want to help me and protect me. I bet he'll call the University of Kentucky, where he's going to school, and tell them he's had a family emergency, so he can stay with me here until I'm better."

"That may be so, but you've still been assigned to me to protect," Fraser said. "It's not that I don't want to look after you; it's just that it was all very sudden and I hadn't had any time to… prepare anything."

"Yeah, well, welcome to Chicago," Amanda said, rolling her eyes and lying back on her pillows.

"Thank you," Fraser said, inclining his head toward her and smiling.

Amanda rolled her eyes again. "I wasn't being nice," she said bluntly.

"Ah," Fraser said, raising his eyebrows and nodding.

"Besides, I don't want to be taken care of," Amanda said. "I'll be the only person on campus with a bodyguard. I'm a grown adult, I shouldn't need something like that." Amanda sighed. "So how many other girls have you been assigned to look after?" she asked.

"Well, only one, she was quite a bit younger than you," Fraser said. He pulled up a chair next to her bed. "She was a Canadian trade diplomat's daughter."

"Oh," Amanda said. "How was that for you?"

"It wasn't very well, unfortunately; you see, she was only 16 and kept trying to get rid of me," Fraser said, sounding confused.

"Gee, I wonder why," Amanda said sarcastically. Judging by the lack of reaction from Fraser, he'd missed the sarcasm. "Did she succeed?"

"Only once, and not for long; I knew the city better than she did and I was able to find her," Fraser said.

"Well, you won't have to worry about that with me," Amanda assured him. "Not only am I injured, but although I don't like this whole situation, I think you're handsome."

Fraser blushed. "Uh, thank you," he said awkwardly.

"OK, Fraser, it's a done deal. You are now Miss Collins' official bodyguard," Ray said, as he walked through the door.

"Very good, Ray," Fraser said affirmatively. Amanda sighed again.

Chapter 2 will be posted as soon as I possibly can. I usually write RENT fan fiction stories, so to be writing Due South, like I said before, is a new thing. I know Amanda might seem a bit Mary-Sueish right now (and I would guess that it's only going to get worse before it gets better), but I would think that, if I were violated, I woudn't turn down protection and I certainly wouldn't be stable and normal for quite some time. Another thing I am going to disclaim and apologize for right now is any mistakes or unrealistic things I might do with her schooling, major, and/or concentration. I'm not a theatre major and I know nothing about graduate school, so please forgive me for any mess-ups there. Thanks.

I'm going to try my best to update regularly, but as I'm nearing freshman year mid-terms, I can make no promises. I do need to start a strategy of writing up the entire story before posting, but haven't learned that yet, LOL. Please don't forget to review. I am really hoping this story is well-received and that readers leave reviews. I love feedback and reply to anything, as I care about my readers and enjoy having discussions with them about my stories and where they are going.

I'll update again as soon as possible. Thank you kindly for reading.

Renthead07


	2. Not Strong Enough

**Chapter 2 – Not Strong Enough**

A few hours later, after Amanda's HIV and rape kit tests were completed, Amanda's parents and Alexander arrived.

"Amanda," Alexander said breathlessly, and he hurried over and gently embraced her.

"Hi, Alex," Amanda said, looking at him. "How are you?"

"Never mind me, how are you?" Alexander asked her.

"Alex, I'm not terminally ill or dying, first of all, OK?" Amanda said firmly to him. "I've been hurt, yes, but you can stop right now looking at me like I'm glass about to break."

"Well, yeah, but I… I'm sorry. I was just so worried," Alexander said helplessly.

Amanda nodded. "But I'm fine. Really," she said.

"Well, OK," Alexander said, placing a gentle kiss on her lips.

Amanda chuckled, even though it hurt to kiss him. "Ow," she squeaked.

Alexander immediately pulled away, blushing. "Sorry," he said. He moved to kiss her on the forehead instead.

Amanda smiled and looked over his shoulder. She noticed her parents standing in the doorway. "Hi, Mom, Dad," she said quietly.

Amanda's parents entered the room and hugged her, careful of her broken ribs and her gunshot wound. "Look, don't start freaking out, OK? I can't handle it if you guys freak out right now, too. I'm fine," Amanda said. "I'm being released tomorrow. Fraser here has been assigned to protect me once I get out."

"How long are you going to protect her?" Mr. Collins asked, standing to shake Fraser's hand.

"As long as is needed to get the men who did this to Amanda behind bars, sir," Fraser said. "My name is Constable Benton Fraser, Royal Canadian Mounted Police."

Mr. Collins nodded. "Please call me Anthony," he said. He indicated to his wife. "This is my wife, Robin."

"It's very nice to meet you, ma'am," Fraser said, smiling at Mrs. Collins.

"And you; you saved our little girl," Mrs. Collins said, smiling at him.

"Well, yes, that is what happened, but let's not forget that I was also assisted by Detective Vecchio here," Fraser said, indicating Ray.

"You're going to help find my daughter's attackers?" Mr. Collins asked Ray, turning to face him.

"I will do more than that, sir, if I can I will find them personally and make them wish they'd never been born," Ray promised Mr. Collins.

"Thank you," Mr. Collins said, satisfied.

Ray nodded. Then he turned to Amanda. "Amanda, I spoke to Doctor Storm yesterday and he told us not to tell you the results of your tests. But I think you should know just what they found," he said.

Amanda suddenly looked terrified. "Well, OK," she said, "what did they find?"

"They found fluids, which we're going to use to track down these guys," Ray said, remembering what the doctor had told him earlier.

Amanda's hand flew to her mouth. "Oh, my God, but doesn't this mean I could have HIV or be pregnant or something, if they found fluids?" she asked.

"That's a possibility, but we're going to give you medication to prevent that, Amanda," Doctor Storm said to her. "Even if your HIV test comes up negative, we're going to test you again in three months, just to make sure."

Amanda nodded and Alexander went over to her. "Easy, Amanda, it's OK," he said. "Calm down."

"How can I calm down, Alex?" Amanda asked him. "I might be pregnant or have HIV or something."

"Amanda, don't think that way, not for one second," Alexander said firmly. "They're going to set you up with a sketch artist so you can identify the guy. That'll help a lot. You know that, we always watch those shows on TV and it helps."

Amanda nodded.

Ray looked at her. "Amanda, can you possibly describe the three men for me?" he asked her.

"Yes," Amanda said. "One of the men was Black and he had a buzz cut. He was clean-shaven. On his arm, he had a tattoo of a fighting fox on his shoulder. He was wearing a white muscle shirt and jeans. The second man was Caucasian and had black hair and bushy black eyebrows. He had stubble on his face, too. The third man… he was also Caucasian and had brown hair. He was beginning to bald and was clean-shaven, too. I'll never forget their faces."

Ray nodded and flipped his notepad shut, where he had been taking notes. "Combined with the sketch, this will help a lot, Amanda, thank you," he said.

"You're welcome, Detective," she said.

Fraser looked at Amanda, who was looking more tired than before. "Perhaps we should let Amanda rest," he said to the others. "It's been a long day for her. We can all dote upon her tomorrow when she gets released."

The others nodded and left the room. Fraser moved to leave with them, but Amanda's voice stopped him.

"Fraser," she said.

Fraser looked at her. "Yes, Amanda?" he asked.

"Could you please stay? I… I need to talk to you."

Fraser realized it was not an order, it was a request. But as her bodyguard, he felt compelled to honor it like an order.

"I mean, I know I'm safe here, but I still am scared, especially about my release and if they haven't been found by tomorrow, what if they find me again?" Amanda asked him.

"I highly doubt they will find you again, Amanda," Fraser said. "I'm sure they think you're dead, actually." He noticed her heart rate was a bit high, and he felt himself surrendering to her request. "But… if it makes you feel safer… I'll stay with you tonight. It is my duty to protect you, after all, once you are released. Nobody said it couldn't start now."

Amanda nodded and lay down, careful of her wound and broken ribs. But she still winced in pain. Fraser noticed this and was by her side in a flash, helping her.

"Thank you," she said softly, looking up at him.

"You're welcome," Fraser replied. He pressed the morphine button on her I.V. and watched as she quickly slid into sleep.

* * *

In the middle of the night, Fraser was startled awake. Someone was screaming.

He knew instantly the screaming was Amanda. He couldn't think of how possibly the attackers could have found her here and now.

It took him a moment to realize she was screaming in her sleep. She was having a nightmare.

Fraser took a moment to orientate himself with the darkness. He didn't know where a light was to turn on. He made his way slowly from his roll-away bed to hers. He could hear her heart rate was high, but it was not high enough to alert the nurses, if her screaming hadn't already. He knew only he could wake her and calm her down.

"Amanda," he said. He searched in the darkness and found her arm. He shook it lightly. "Amanda!"

Fraser felt her hit him hard on the chest in her sleep, and then she finally awoke from the jolt and her screams stopped. Instead, her screams were replaced with tears and gasps of panic. Although she knew it was Fraser's hands holding her arms, she couldn't calm down.

"Amanda, it's all right. It was a nightmare, only a dream," Fraser's voice said calmly to her.

Amanda looked at where his voice was coming from. "Oh, Fraser," she sobbed and he wrapped an arm gently around her, careful not to aggravate her injuries, "I'm s-sorry I w-woke you. I just had a t-t-terrible dream…"

"What was it about?" Fraser asked. He felt Amanda tense with hesitation. "It helps sometimes to talk about it. It makes it go away and not come back, usually."

"I dreamt about the attackers. I could f-feel them around me, h-hurting me again," Amanda said. She sighed deeply and lay against Fraser's chest. She heard him groan. She looked up at where she thought his face was. "Did I hit you?"

"Yes," Fraser said softly, "but don't worry, I'll be fine." He looked down at her, where he could see a faint outline of her body. "Are you all right now?" He felt Amanda nod against his chest. "Go back to sleep. I'm right here. I'll be here in the morning when you wake up."

Fraser felt Amanda nod again. Then she lay down again.

Fraser started humming a monotonous tone, something like a chant. "What are you doing?" Amanda asked him.

"Helping you to lower your heart rate," Fraser said.

"Oh," Amanda said. She could feel herself relaxing from the calming sound of his voice and Fraser could see the monitor glowing in the darkness showing her heart rate slowing. "Thank you… Goodnight, Fraser."

"Goodnight, Amanda."

* * *

The next afternoon, as Amanda was wheeled out to her parents' car in the parking lot, Fraser squeezed Amanda's hand encouragingly.

"It'll be fine," he said to her. "You're going to stay with me until the men are caught and once they are, you'll be back on campus and everything will be back to normal."

"But what about my schoolwork and everything?" Amanda asked. "I have to keep up."

"Your parents spoke to your professors. You will be able to get everything online that you need," Fraser said.

"OK," Amanda said, visibly less worried. Especially now, she was very thankful she had received a laptop computer as a high school graduation gift.

"Are you nervous?" Fraser asked her, after a long moment of silence.

Amanda sighed, ignoring the spasm of pain the motion sent through her side.

"Yes," she admitted, "but you'll only convince me not to be."

Fraser smiled as they reached the car. "I'm going to ride with you, if that's all right," he said.

"Do I have any other choice?" Amanda asked.

"Not really, no, I just thought I'd make sure," Fraser replied, as though that settled the matter.

"Then I'm not one to argue, what good will it do?" Amanda said, as they got into the car.

* * *

"Whoa, this is your place?" Amanda asked, upon entering Fraser's apartment.

"Yes," Fraser said. "It's not much, but it's…" He paused. He was certainly not going to call it home. His home was the Alaskan tundra. He sighed. "Not much."

"I think it's nice. Cozy," Amanda said.

Fraser smiled. "Thank you," he said. "Shall I show you to your room?"

"Sure," Amanda said. He showed her his bedroom and Amanda looked at him, confused. "But isn't this your only room?" she asked.

"Well, yes, but—" Fraser said, but Amanda interrupted.

"Where are you going to sleep?" she asked him, raising her eyebrows.

"I recently purchased a roll-away bed to sleep on for this, uh, occasion," Fraser said, not wanting to use the words 'situation' or 'circumstance'. "I was going to put it in the living room, so I could be nearby if you need me, but you will also have your space."

"Oh, well, OK. Are you sure?" Amanda asked.

"Positive," Fraser said. "All that matters is your well-being. Your health is paramount. Don't worry about me."

"Oh, all right," she said. She went into her— or rather, Fraser's— room.

Fraser smiled. "Very good," he said, and he beckoned to the wolf. "Diefenbaker." The wolf whined. "Now, now, none of your nonsense; we need to care for Amanda, so no whining."

Diefenbaker let out another whine before quieting and Fraser nodded and the wolf followed him to the roll-away bed.

* * *

A few days later, Fraser and Amanda were eating breakfast prepared by Fraser, when Ray called. After the call, Fraser came back to the table.

"You know, it makes me nervous when you leave for phone calls like that, with what's going on," Amanda told him.

"My apologies, Amanda," Fraser said, "but it was important. I have good news from Ray."

"What happened?" Amanda asked.

"He found the men who did this to you, from your rape kit," Fraser said. "It provided DNA and they found matches. He asked us to come in and identify the men out of a lineup as soon as we can."

"But Fraser, if he found the men and that evidence against them proves it was them who did this to me, why do I have to identify them?" Amanda asked. "And who else would Ray use in the lineup? How does that work?"

"He puts other criminals in the lineup that are also accused of rape, only not yours," Fraser answered. "Then you pick your attackers out."

"Oh, OK," Amanda said.

Fraser noticed she suddenly went quiet and wasn't eating. "Amanda, are you nervous?" he asked.

Amanda nodded and found she could barely swallow the food she was chewing. "Very," she admitted. "I don't think I can handle being in the same room with them again after what they did, especially if there are… more of them."

"If you're afraid of being in the same room with them, I can assure you Ray and I will both be with you and you will be fully protected," Fraser said. Amanda nodded, but was still silent. "It will be very quick; all you have to do is enter the room, Ray will ask you which of the men did it to you, you point at them and state so, and then you can go."

Amanda nodded again. "OK, as long as you're with me, Fraser, I'll feel better," she said, sounding relieved. "I can't help but feel safe around you."

Fraser smiled appreciatively. "I'm glad I make you feel safe, Amanda," he said.

* * *

Amanda and Alexander went on a date a week after her release from the hospital. They went out for a fancy dinner and then sat down on Amanda's bed in her dorm to watch a movie. Alexander knew how much Amanda disliked being scared, particularly after her incident, so he often watched chick flicks with her, if only she let him sometimes watch boxing and fighting.

At some point during the movie, Amanda looked over and noticed Alexander had gone quiet. He wasn't really watching the movie at all. She turned it off. "What are you thinking about?" she asked him softly.

Alexander looked down at her. "Oh," he said, "uh, I don't know… things."

"Things like what?" Amanda asked curiously.

"Well..." Alexander began. "About what happened to you, I guess."

"Oh," Amanda said, her heart sinking. "What about it?"

"I... I guess what I want to say is… I'm scared for you. That's the only way I can think of to describe it," Alexander said. "I mean, when they find these guys, you'll identify them and they'll arrest them and put them in jail and stuff, hopefully for a long time, but..."

"But...?" Amanda prompted him.

"But... I'm still scared for you, that you could be pregnant or have HIV or something," Alexander said.

"Oh, Alex... if I do, if I am pregnant or something, you know we'll deal with that, right?" Amanda said to him. "Whatever happens to me, if anything, we can deal with it."

Alexander was silent for a moment before answering. "No, Amanda," he said.

"No?" Amanda asked, confused.

"No," Alexander said, getting off the couch and standing up. "I... I'm not strong enough to deal with something this huge. I can't deal with all of it. I'm too scared. I never thought something like this would happen to you or me or anyone else I knew. I'm sorry, but there can't be a 'we' anymore, there's no 'us' anymore." He looked at her through sad, scared eyes. "I'm sorry. I only wish I could be stronger for you."

Amanda watched him turn and walk away. "But— I..."

But he was already gone.

Amanda sank down onto her bed, rolled onto her side, pulled her knees up to her chest, and cried. For the first time in her life, she felt very incredibly alone.

This is the end of chapter 2. I'm so sorry to keep you guys waiting for updates. I honestly did not intend to wait so long to update this. But it's a very new section of fan fiction for me, and I'm really nervous about writing the story and how it will be received. If you guys think Amanda is being Mary-Sueish at all, remember what she has been through and maybe you will change your mind. So far, it has been well-received, though, for which I'm very grateful. Thanks to everyone who has already read and reviewed, especially Niente-Zero. I have something of a third chapter typed up already. I will post it as soon as I can.

I don't really know where I want to take Fraser's involvement with Amanda, whether I want to make it more personal and continue developing a relationship between them, or if Fraser would simply choose duty over a woman (he has fallen in love impulsively before, after all) and they would simply remain friends. I would like to deepen their friendship to a relationship, but I'm not sure how to. I am thinking on it and writing anything I come up with.

Thanks for being patient with me while I write and try to update quickly for you guys. I really appreciate it.

Don't forget to review. Thank you kindly for reading.

Renthead07


	3. Meant to Hear That Shot

I first thought about calling this chapter Protocol, but I like the latter title better (the one I decided on.) The reason the trial is not written out at all is simply because I know nothing about the law and trial system in any jurisdiction and I want to save myself a lot of grief. I hope that's OK. Here is chapter 3.

**Chapter 3 – Meant to Hear That Shot**

The next day, Ray picked Fraser and Amanda up and took them down to the precinct. Amanda hadn't told Fraser about Alexander breaking up with her the night before.

"Ray, can I ask you something?" Amanda asked, as they walked into the station.

"Sure," Ray said.

"These men I'm about to identify, if you've already caught them and confirmed it was them through the DNA, why do I have to identify them?"

"It's just protocol, Amanda," Ray said.

"I don't think there can possibly be anything like 'protocol' for something like this," Amanda pointed out.

Ray nodded. "I suppose you're right. So just recognize them, point them out in the line, and then you can go."

"All right," Amanda said, crossing her arms over her chest defensively.

Ray led Amanda into a room where six men were sitting on chairs, their hands in cuffs. Fraser stayed behind Amanda, Diefenbaker right on his heels, and the men stood up. Amanda gasped.

"It's OK, Amanda," Fraser whispered to her. Amanda gulped.

"OK, Amanda, I'm going to ask you one question," Ray said, looking at her, all business. "Can you point and tell me which of these men assaulted and raped you?"

Amanda didn't move for a moment. It looked as though she had frozen. But she heaved a shuddery breath when she felt Fraser touch her arm lightly, although she didn't relax.

"That one, that one, and that one," she said, pointing at three of the men.

Ray looked at the men and they were all quickly shuffled out of the room. "Good, Amanda, thank you," Ray said. "You can go now."

Amanda nodded, spun on her heel and left the room quickly. Fraser, who had been watching her reaction to seeing the men again, followed. He was certain she would run.

"Amanda, wait!" he called after her. But Amanda didn't stop. Fraser picked up speed and followed her. He caught up with her easily and spun her around by her shoulders. "Amanda, wait!"

"Fraser, let me go!" she yelled at him.

"Amanda, calm down," Fraser said, slightly breathlessly, not letting go of her.

"No! Please let me go. I want to get away from here," Amanda cried. "Nothing is going r-right anymore. I just put those t-three men behind b-bars, Alex b-broke up with me, like this crime against me made s-something w-wrong with me, and he can't handle it any of it any b-better than I can, and my mom looked at me the other day like I was some sort of disease." She looked up at him, tears in her eyes. "Please let me go. I just need to get away for a while."

"Amanda, please don't run," Fraser said. He still didn't release her. "I know you're upset and angry and scared and overwhelmed, but I want to help you. I've been assigned to protect you—"

"But I identified the guys. They're going to jail, aren't they, and you'll be… relieved of duty or whatever?" Amanda asked.

"Not officially, no," Fraser said. "They have to be bailed out, and if they meet bail, they will appear in a trial to be formally charged and convicted. Bail assures that they will do so."

"Oh," Amanda said. "So I'll just have to testify and then they'll be put in jail and I'll be fine?"

Fraser nodded. "Yes," he said. "I'm certain you will win your case and they'll go to jail for a very long time. They'll never be able to hurt you again."

"Then you won't have to protect me anymore?"

"That's right."

Amanda looked at him and saw the look in Fraser's eyes. "You don't… want to be relieved of duty… do you?" she asked quietly.

Fraser shook his head. "No, I don't," he said honestly. He gently wiped the tears from her face. There was a moment of silence between them and then Fraser leaned down to kiss Amanda. Amanda felt his lips brush hers, but then he pulled away.

"What is it? Did I do something wrong?" Amanda asked.

"No, of course not," Fraser said. "I just think that maybe we should… wait until the trial is over and everything is done… to maintain professionalism?"

He looked at her, hoping for understanding. "OK," she said, "I understand. I mean, duty calls, right?"

"Um… right," Fraser said awkwardly.

"Even if that duty is me," Amanda said.

"Yes," Fraser said, looking down at her.

"Well, we've only got a couple weeks until the trial's over," Amanda said. "I can wait until then."

"As can I," Fraser said, smiling at her. He knew there would be more where that had come from. He realized he was looking forward to it.

* * *

As they were walking down the courthouse steps, the trial having ended five minutes before, Fraser pulled Amanda aside. Amanda had testified magnificently, without losing any of her self-control, and she had won her case. The three men were going to jail for a maximum sentence of 20 years, convicted of aggravated assault, including grievous bodily harm, and rape. Amanda was a free woman again.

"Are you all right?" he asked her.

"I think so," Amanda said, looking at him. She had her arms crossed over her chest in a protective gesture. She looked confused. "I don't know."

Fraser looked down at her. "I'm sure you already know this," he said, "but although the emotional trauma will linger… things will get better. You will be able to move on eventually."

Amanda nodded. "I know," she said. "Thank you, Fraser… for everything you've done for me."

"It was no trouble at all, Amanda," Fraser said, nodding and smiling at her. Amanda smiled back. "We should get back to my apartment. You need to rest."

Amanda wasn't going to argue with that. She felt drained. "OK," she said.

* * *

Amanda was sleeping in Fraser's bedroom when Ray dropped by. "How's she doing?" he asked Fraser.

"She's sleeping right now," Fraser said. "Ray, she knows it's all over, but she's still really overwhelmed by everything. She's still scared, except when she's with me."

"Yeah, she's going to be that way for a while, Benny," Ray said. "But if you make her, uh, you know, feel safe… then by all means, you can help her out. Now that the investigation's over and those guys are going to jail, my part is done."

Fraser nodded and looked at Ray. He figured he knew what Ray meant by that statement.

"Do you like her, Benny?" Ray asked suddenly.

Fraser was silent for a moment, contemplating this question. He knew Ray would probably ask. Then he swallowed and said, "Yes, I do." He looked at Ray. "I don't know how to explain it, but I feel… connected to her in some way. I know we haven't known each other for very long, but…"

"No, I totally get it," Ray said, nodding. "It's like you were meant to hear that shot, Benny." He smiled.

"Yes, Ray, I think I was meant to hear that shot," Fraser said, nodding and smiling back at Ray.

This is the end of chapter 3. I know it's short, but I'm working on the next chapter as quickly as I can. It will probably be some dates between Fraser and Amanda— opera, ice cream socials, Broadway shows, Chinatown, whatever I can come up with that is slightly old-fashioned and Fraser-like. Amanda will take him on dates and such that he might not have done before, either— camping, hiking, horseback riding (OK, he has ridden horse, he's a Mountie and we all know our favorite episode, All The Queen's Horses)— whatever I can think of.

Any suggestions from you readers would be great, too. I'm working really hard on this story, in addition to being really busy with college. Thank God mid-terms are over, but now I have finals to look forward to! Ugh, college sucks, sometimes anyway.

I'm really glad I ended this chapter on a good note with Ray accepting Fraser's growing connection and relationship with Amanda. I do want Amanda to go back to school in a few weeks and tell her friends what happened (that being my fault; I made an error and never put something like that in.) I think it'd be hilarious to see how her friends will react to her first being protected by a Mountie and then having a relationship with one, hehe.

Thanks so much again to Niente-Zero for bouncing a couple ideas off me. I'm going to work with them and see what I come up with. Any other ideas from other readers are appreciated, of course; I would most likely use them. I'm trying really hard to make this a good story, I really am.

Please don't forget to review. I love feedback. Thank you kindly.

Renthead07


	4. Sweet Dreams is All It Takes

**Chapter 4 - Sweet Dreams is All It Takes**

A week later, when Fraser had a day off, he spent it with Amanda. She didn't want to return back to school yet, expressing the want to spend time with him when he wasn't working. And she also just didn't feel ready to face her friends and others yet.

"Amanda," he said to her, as they were walking down the street, side-by side, Fraser on the outside of the pavement, in Chinatown eating a corn dog each for dinner that night (Fraser hadn't done his weekly grocery shopping yet to be able to cook her anything.) "I just noticed something."

"Noticed something?" Amanda asked him.

"About you, that's... different," Fraser said.

"Oh?" Amanda asked curiously, smiling playfully at him. "What?"

"Your bruises are gone," Fraser said.

Amanda smiled. "Oh... yeah, they are, aren't they?" she mused.

Fraser nodded. "You..." he began.

"I?" Amanda asked him curiously. A playful smile played on her lips.

"You..." Fraser began again. "Amanda, I don't know how to say this... I... I'm very poor at... expressing... my feelings?" He blushed, feeling unintelligent. "But... I feel like I have a... a connection of sorts... with... with you." He looked down at her. "Am I just being utterly bizarre?"

"No," Amanda said, looking up at him. "I agree, actually. I mean, after what happened to me... it makes sense that I would connect with you, since you and Ray protected me after it happened, instead of... doing more harm."

"But you were violated," Fraser said. "Why didn't you... react in a more... negative manner?"

"I suppose you were different," Amanda said. "You and Ray both were... are. You wanted to help and protected me and you didn't do more to me, which is why I didn't... shut down or anything."

Fraser nodded. "I see," he said.

"Are you confused, Fraser?" Amanda asked.

"Very," Fraser admitted.

Amanda smiled. "I think you understand more than you realize," she said.

Fraser nodded, still confused.

* * *

A few hours later, Amanda was dozing off in Fraser's armchair and Fraser was lying on his back on the floor of his apartment, reading a book. A question occurred to him and he sat up.

"Amanda, can I ask you something?"

Amanda nodded. "Of course, Fraser," she said.

"I was wondering if you would like to... well, in a matter of speaking, I'm..." Fraser began awkwardly.

"Are you always this articulate? Finish your sentence, Fraser," Amanda teased him.

Fraser smiled nervously. "Well, I guess I'm... I'm wondering if you would like to go out to dinner sometime?" he asked finally.

"You mean, like a date?" Amanda asked him.

"Yes," Fraser said. "Like a date, yes."

Amanda nodded. "Sure," she said, smiling at him. "I'd like that."

"It's settled, then," Fraser said. "Shall we say, breakfast in the morning? Then a Symphony Orchestra or something?"

"That's a great idea," Amanda said.

"All right," Fraser said, smiling at her. Well, I'm going to bid you goodnight. So, um, I hope you find your sleeping arrangements conducive to..."

"Fraser."

"Yes?"

"'Sweet dreams' is all it takes."

"Ah. Yes, of course. Well... sweet dreams."

"Sweet dreams, Fraser," Amanda said, smiling at him.

She went into his bedroom and curled up in his bed to sleep. She didn't hear any sound of Diefenbaker's snoring that night. She was certainly looking forward to the morning.

* * *

The next morning, Amanda slept in. She didn't wake up until 10:30. When she did, she was confused for a moment. Then she remembered where she was and felt very comfortable.

She got out of bed and went out to the kitchen. Fraser was already dressed, although out of uniform, reading the newspaper and drinking a cup of coffee.

"Good morning," Amanda said, smiling at him.

"Good morning, Amanda," Fraser said, smiling back at her. "Did you sleep well?"

"Yes, very well, thank you," Amanda said. "I'm excited for our breakfast together and then the symphony. Are you?"

Fraser nodded. "I am," he said. "I would like to show you all of what Chicago has to offer. You've only seen the worst of it so far."

Amanda nodded and smiled. "I look forward to it," she said.

"Are you hungry? We can go to breakfast as soon as you're dressed," Fraser said.

"OK, I'll go get dressed now," Amanda said. She went into Fraser's bedroom and dressed, but as she had all her clothes at her apartment and was still staying with him, she couldn't wear something exactly nice to their date. But she resigned to wearing a nice shirt and some slimming jeans and met him by the front door.

"Are you ready?" Fraser asked her.

Amanda nodded and he held up his arm. She linked hers through his and they left to go to breakfast.

* * *

"Fraser," Amanda asked, as they ate breakfast at a nice café, "do you think we could, you know, stop by my apartment before the symphony? Obviously, I need to go to it in more than just jeans and a shirt."

Fraser nodded. "Of course," he said. "Do you think you're ready to go back?"

"Yes, I think so," Amanda said. "I mean, I like staying with you, but..."

"But you also feel you should reestablish your independence," Fraser suggested.

_And you would probably be better off without me now_, Fraser thought.

Amanda nodded. "Yes," she said. She cocked an eyebrow at him. "How do you read me so well?"

Fraser smiled. "I'm not sure," he said. They finished eating and Fraser said, "Are you ready to go?"

"Yes. Thank you for breakfast. I enjoyed it very much," Amanda said to him.

"You're certainly welcome," Fraser said, smiling at her.

* * *

Fraser waited in the entryway of Amanda's apartment for her to finish getting ready, so they could leave to get to the symphony. She had mentioned to him that she'd wanted to get ready as quickly as possible, to avoid running into her three roommates.

They weren't around at the moment, but Amanda had told Fraser their names: Kate, Vanessa, and Carmen. Vanessa, Amanda had told Fraser, was wild and outgoing and a partier who loved to have a good time; Carmen was quiet and laid-back and the most insecure of the four; Kate was right in the middle, because she could be loud when she wanted to, but also knew when it was right to be sensitive. She was also the most sensible.

Amanda didn't want to be caught at their apartment at the moment, because she hadn't told them what had happened. She had only said she'd become ill and was staying at a friend's house (she didn't mention Fraser's name) for a few days. She knew they would be wondering why she wasn't back yet, since a few days had morphed into a few weeks, but she would handle that later.

Fraser looked up as he heard Amanda clear her throat. He was stunned when he saw her descending the stairs. She was wearing a strapless black evening gown and her hair was put into an elegant twist at the top of her head. Especially since her bruises were gone and she had some make-up on, she looked completely different.

She smiled as she approached him. _Say something_, her eyes seemed to be telling him without her actually asking.

"Um, you, um... you look..." Fraser stammered.

Amanda smiled and Fraser's heart sped up. "Are you always this articulate?" she teased him.

Fraser inhaled a deep breath and said, "You look beautiful, Amanda."

"Thank you," Amanda said, smiling at him. "You look dashing yourself."

Fraser smiled. "Thank you," he said.

He fidgeted slightly and Amanda noticed this. "Is something wrong, Fraser?" she asked him.

"No," Fraser said, "I'm just... not completely comfortable being out of uniform."

"Oh," Amanda said, nodding. "Well, I wouldn't have minded you going in uniform, but I thought you would be more comfortable out of it for one night."

Fraser nodded. "Don't worry about me, I'll be fine," he said. "It's just odd, that's all. Besides, the neckline on my uniform is dreadful. It improves your posture, because if you slouch or turn your head the wrong way, you practically get decapitated."

Amanda laughed as they went outside. "Well, you look amazing in it," she said, "so I hope you'll forgive me for stopping into the precinct a few times in the future."

"I wouldn't mind at all," Fraser said, smiling at her. "I hope we can see each other again."

Amanda suddenly looked crestfallen. "Do you think we'll be able to see each other again?" she asked. "I mean, I know I have school and you have your job, but..."

"I hope so, Amanda," Fraser said. "I like you a lot. But I don't think... either of us can make any promises at this point."

Amanda nodded. "I understand," she said.

"But I don't want to completely depress you, so shall we?" Fraser asked, holding up his arm.

"Yes," Amanda said, smiling as she linked her arm through his and they stepped outside. A limo was waiting for them. "Oh, Fraser, you didn't really?" she asked excitedly.

Fraser smiled. "I had hoped you'd like it," he said to her.

"I love it," Amanda said. "I haven't ridden in a limo since I was about twelve. My dad took me for a Christmas present once."

"Did you enjoy it?" Fraser asked, as he opened the door for her and she got in.

"Well, in all honesty, I got a little sick," Amanda admitted, grinning. "But other than that, it was great. We rode around a part of Louisville, looking at the best Christmas lights."

Fraser nodded and cocked an eyebrow at her. "How's your stomach now?" he asked, as the limo drove off.

"It's fine," Amanda assured him, smiling. "I'm with you."

Fraser smiled appreciatively. "I would like to take you to look at Christmas lights in a limo sometime," he said.

"OK, we'll keep that in mind for a future date," Amanda said.

They arrived at the symphony and Fraser opened the limousine door to help Amanda out. She gave him a curious look as they walked into the concert hall. "Fraser, may I ask, who taught you to be so... formal?" she asked him.

"My grandmother, actually," Fraser said. "She would have liked you."

"Oh, would she have?" Amanda asked, smiling.

"Yes, she would have," Fraser said. "She was beautiful and gentle and kind, but at the same time, she was fiery and somewhat of a gossip. I miss her dearly, but every time I do something like this, I think of her."

Amanda nodded. "I wish I could have known her," she said.

Fraser smiled. "As do I, Amanda," he said.

_

* * *

_

One week later...

"Fraser, I think I'm going to move back to my apartment tomorrow," Amanda said, while eating dinner with Fraser.

"Really, you think you're ready?" Fraser asked.

"Yes, I do," Amanda said. "I mean, I enjoy staying around here, but you need your bed back and I need to... to tell the girls what happened."

"Do you want me to go with you, for moral support?" Fraser asked.

"That would be nice," Amanda said. "Thank you, Fraser."

"Of course, Amanda," Fraser said, smiling at her.

* * *

"Oh, my _God_, you're finally home!" Vanessa yelled, as she ran up to hug Amanda. "What the hell happened to you?"

"And who is this?" Kate asked curiously, coming back over from where she'd been pushed aside by Vanessa to hug Amanda.

"Girls, this is—" Amanda began, before Fraser interrupted her.

"Constable Benton Fraser, Royal Canadian Mounted Police," Benton said, holding out his hand for them to shake. "I first came to Chicago on the trail of the killers of my father, and for various reasons, I've remained, attached as liaison with the Chicago Police Department."

Carmen looked at Amanda. "Interesting type, Mandy," she teased.

Amanda shrugged. "He's Canadian," she said.

"Ah," Carmen said, looking up at him (she was the shortest of the four at only five-foot-two.) "So, um, how exactly did Amanda land you?" she asked Fraser.

"Well," Fraser said, "I don't think it's my... decision to tell you that."

Carmen looked at Amanda again. "What's he talking about?" she asked her.

Amanda sighed. "We should probably sit down," she said.

"OK," Carmen said. She, Vanessa, Kate, Amanda, and Fraser all went into the living room area and sat in chairs. "What's up?"

"There's something you girls need to know," Amanda said. "The reason I've been gone for so long... I told you I was sick and that I was staying at a friend's place... Well, I wasn't sick and it was Fraser's apartment I've been staying at." Kate, Vanessa, and Carmen's faces split into evil grins. Amanda quickly recovered, "It's not like that. Something happened to me that night we went to the movie and I called Alex."

"What?" Kate asked.

"I called Alex and I paced around, like I usually do... it was really stupid of me to do, but... Anyway, I got lost and three men shot me, assaulted me, and raped me," Amanda said quickly, wanting to get the worst over with.

Silence, then—

"What?" Carmen asked softly.

"I know it's... a lot to take in," Amanda said. "Believe me, I know. I... I didn't want to _not _tell you girls, you're my best friends... But I wasn't ready for anyone to know who... didn't have to."

"What do you mean?" Kate asked.

"I was in the hospital for a while, having tests taken for HIV and DNA tests and everything. Then Alex broke up with me and I went to court and testified against them."

"OK, he is going to die in seven days," Vanessa said maliciously.

Amanda saw the look on Fraser's face and laughed. She knew none of the girls would ever do such a thing, but she appreciated the thought regardless. "They were arrested and put in jail. I've been recovering at Fraser's place and we've been... getting to know each other better in the process. He's a Mountie and he protected me while the investigation was going on," she said.

None of the girls looked like they knew what to say. But Amanda didn't mind. She just wanted the shock to be over for them and for them to understand.

"Please don't be angry with me for not telling you," she said. "I wanted to, I really did. I just... wasn't ready yet."

Kate nodded. "We understand," she said. "We're glad you're OK. Everything's settled, right?"

"Well, I'm going to continue getting tested for HIV every three months for the next year," Amanda said, "but other than that, everything's great. I'm happy with Fraser."

"So you're home now?" Carmen asked.

"Yes, Carmen, I'm home now," Amanda said. "I had to come back. All my stuff's here with you girls."

Carmen nodded. "We've been waiting to hear from you and not touching any of it," she said.

"Thanks," Amanda said, smiling. "I'm glad I'm back."

"We're glad you're back, too, Mandy," Kate said.

This is the end of chapter 4. There will be more to come as soon as I can think of something fitting. I'm only writing what feels right at this point, and with the FraserOC relationship, nothing really does. I'm posting just to post, I guess; this story isn't going as well as I'd hoped it would. Of course, I knew what obstacles I'd run into, writing the only FraserOC dS story on the entire site, but I figured I'd enjoy the challenge. I can see now how wrong I might have been.

I hope you readers are enjoying what I post up. I know FraserOC is very different from anything that's ever been written on Fan Fiction, but I'm daring to try it out. Please tell me what you think by leaving a review. I know people have been checking out this story and not reviewing, but I'm not going to beg. Thanks to vic32 and Niente Zero for reviewing for me so far. You guys rock. More to come as soon as I can.

Renthead07


	5. Making It Count

I'm so sorry for not updating this story in a long time. But with finals week completely wearing me out, and life in general being pretty busy until the beginning of Christmas break, I hadn't had any inspiration in forever. Then, lo and behold, the day before Christmas Eve, I get some inspiration! Luckily, I'm updating before family comes for Christmas today and I go out of town for New Year's in a week or so. Christmas break ends for me on the 12th. Then it's a new semester at my hands to tackle and attempt to do well with.

And finally, I seem to be getting toward where I want to go with this story, which is... well, you'll see. Just in case I don't make it yet, I don't want to spoil it right away. I've decided to take a significant jump in time, in order to give me an opportunity to expand even more on Fraser and Amanda's relationship. I know it might not make entire sense, but the end of chapter 4 was around January 13. I wanted to do a Christmas scenario with them, but since they'd only known each other a week by the previous Christmas in this story (which was around chapter 3), it didn't make any sense to put this Christmas stuff then. I hope you guys don't mind the jump in time. I had to do it (although it's very awkward, I realize) in order to get to where I want to go. I don't normally get mixed up or change my mind like this, I actually never have, but I decided to here. I hope that's OK. To help you out, I should let you know, this story is based somewhere between "Victoria's Secret" and "Bird In The Hand", since Louis is still alive and it's not a Fraser/Meg relationship story.

That's about all I think. Sorry about any inconvenient complications. Merry Christmas. Enjoy. Here's chapter 5 (finally.)

**Chapter 5 – Making It Count**

The night before Christmas Eve, a few weeks before Amanda and Fraser's one-year anniversary, Amanda came home to her apartment to find Vanessa, Carmen, and Kate gone. She suspected they were out and about doing some last-minute cram Christmas shopping. The apartment had been cleaned, but Amanda wasn't planning on going home for Christmas. She felt quite comfortable in Chicago now, especially with the way her relationship with Fraser was going. She would at least give her parents a call on Christmas morning, to see how they were doing and let them know she was OK and life was going well. She would visit them as soon as she could, certainly so they could meet Fraser officially.

She set her purse down on the kitchen table and saw a note laying there. She picked it up and read it.

_Make it count. I'll pick you up tonight at 6 for dinner, then I'm taking you to go dancing. I hope that's all right. I know you probably want to spend time with your girlfriends, though, so I won't keep you too long, I think. See you tonight._

_C.B.F., R.C.M.P._

Amanda smiled to herself as she got a mental picture from the note. Fraser was so old-fashioned sometimes, but she enjoyed his company very much. He was addictive to her. She knew she was falling fast for him, as much as she didn't want to admit it. It all felt cliché to her.

But she knew she wanted to be with him, so she was going to take him up on his spoiling her again. But he would have to concede to some more modern dates with her in the future.

While she picked out her evening gown, she thought of things she could do with him. They could go ice-skating, since it was winter. She wanted to see Christmas lights with him in a limo, but she wasn't sure how to set that up. When it got warmer, she wanted to take him horseback riding and go for walks.

She heard the door open downstairs and knew the girls had arrived back from their shopping. She could hear them chatting animatedly about it.

"Mandy, you here?" Carmen called, looking around.

"Up here, Carmen," Amanda called back.

The girls hid the presents in various places around the apartment, then went upstairs. "What are you doing?" Kate asked Amanda.

"I'm looking for an evening gown," Amanda said, as she dug through the closet that held all four of the girls' dresses and various shirts that they hung up. "Wouldn't you know it, though, all of them are yours, Ness?"

Vanessa smiled. "Here, wear this one," she said. She pulled a jewel tone strapless evening gown off one of her hangers and held it up to Amanda. "It'll fit you."

Amanda was stunned. "Ness, this is... this is beautiful. How much was it?" she asked.

"About $360, but I trust you," Vanessa said. Amanda blanched. Vanessa shook her head. "No way, don't argue. Come on, Amanda, I know you like comfortable clothes and would rather shoot yourself in the foot, but you're going... hey, wait, where _are _you going, that you need a dress from me, anyway?"

Amanda laughed. She wondered when Vanessa would figure that out, instead of playing dress-up-dummy with her.

"I have a date with Fraser," she said. "It's at 6, which is why I'm looking now. I don't want to feel rushed tonight."

Vanessa, Kate, and Carmen squealed excitedly. "That's great!" they chorused.

"You and he are really getting along, aren't you?" Kate asked her.

"Yeah, we are," Amanda said. "Don't say anything, but I'm really hoping we can look at Christmas lights tomorrow."

"That sounds amazing," Kate said, smiling at her.

Amanda grinned. "I know," she said. "But I'm afraid to ask."

"Why?" Vanessa asked. "Be impulsive. Take charge. You're a strong, independent woman."

Amanda smiled and hugged Vanessa. "Thanks, girl," she said.

"So, well, since you have your huge date tonight, I'm guessing you want to only eat a light lunch?" Carmen asked her. Amanda nodded. "Want to hit Chinatown? We four haven't had a chance to really hang out in forever."

"That would be great," Amanda said. "Let me help you guys wrap presents for a while, then we can go when we get hungry."

"OK," they said, smiling at her. The four best friends went downstairs.

* * *

Amanda's hands were shaking nervously, as she waited for Fraser to pick her up.

_Stop shaking so much, Amanda, or you'll ruin your new face, _Vanessa had told her. Vanessa's insistence hadn't done a lot to calm Amanda down.

Amanda smirked and rolled her eyes at the thought. She jumped when she heard the doorbell ring and she ran downstairs to meet him. She smiled when she swung open the door, revealing him standing on her front step, dressed in a suit and tie. He was also wearing his hat.

"Hi," she said. "Vanessa lent me the dress, um..."

The dress was black, strapless, and form-fitting, with a short, flowing train in the back. It cascaded down her body like a black waterfall. Sparkles covered the sweetheart neckline and breast, going down to the knee. Her hair was piled on top of her head in an elegant twist.

"No, I think it's perfect," Fraser said, smiling at her. "You mentioned that you liked my uniform the other day, so I figured, although I didn't want to go dancing with you in it exactly, I'd at least wear my hat."

"Thanks, Fraser, that's considerate of you. You look wonderful," Amanda said, smiling at him.

"You look beautiful yourself," Fraser said, smiling at her. "Are you ready to go?"

"Yes," Amanda said. "The girls and I went to lunch, then they made a unanimous decision to steer clear of the apartment until I tell them I'm back."

"Why?" Fraser asked, confused.

Amanda shrugged. "Hell if I know," she said. "I think they're steering clear in case anything else happens."

"What do you mean?" Fraser asked, still confused.

"Never mind," Amanda said, shaking her head. "Let's go."

"OK," Fraser said, smiling.

* * *

Amanda ordered roasted monkfish loin with black sesame panisse and endive marmalade, while Fraser ordered braised skirt steal and grilled prime hanger steak with spaghetti squash, chestnuts and Vidalia onions. She and Fraser spent much of their dinner talking. Some of it was spent in companionable silence, which Amanda didn't mind in the slightest.

Then they went dancing at the Rebels Swing Dance Club. Amanda had never swing-danced before, but quickly picked up on it with Fraser's teaching. He also taught her how to salsa dance. The music slowed down to bring them together to slow-dance.

"Fraser?" Amanda asked, her head resting on his chest, in the place where it fit just right.

"Yes, Amanda?" Fraser said, his hand intertwined in hers, as they slowly danced around the ballroom.

"I... I love you," Amanda said.

Fraser stopped dancing with her for a moment and looked down at her. He didn't know what to say.

"I've wanted to tell you for a while now," Amanda said. She looked up at him. "You don't have to say anything. It's OK, I understand."

"I... um... I want to... to say something," Fraser stammered.

Amanda looked up at him. "Are you always this articulate? What?" she asked curiously, teasing him.

"I... I love you, too. I, too, have wanted to say it for a while now," Fraser said, after taking a deep breath.

Amanda smiled and leaned her head against his chest again, and they began to dance once more. Then Fraser stopped again.

"What is it, Fraser?" Amanda asked, looking up at him.

Fraser lifted her chin with his finger and leaned down and kissed her. It was much more passionate, tender, and warm than it had been. Fraser gently placed his hands on her pretty face and ran his fingers very gently along her hair, careful not to mess up the hairstyle. Amanda closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around his neck, returning the kiss.

When they parted, Amanda turned and looked at the clock on the wall. She received a slight shock; she hadn't realized it was nearly Midnight. She'd been having to much fun, she'd lost track of time.

She looked back at Fraser, unsure what to do. She didn't want to let him go. She had enjoyed this night with him so much. But she knew she had to get back to her apartment sometime.

"What now?" she asked him.

"Well, do you turn into a pumpkin at Midnight, or can I keep you a little longer?" Fraser asked, grinning at her.

Amanda laughed and leaned against him again. "Fraser, you can keep me forever, if you want," she whispered.

Fraser kissed the top of her head. "Amanda," he said, "I would like to do something with you..." He shook his head, realizing how ridiculous that sounded, and cleared his throat. "After Christmas, I mean I would like to take you somewhere."

"Where?" Amanda asked, looking up at him.

"I would like to show you my home. Consider it a one-year anniversary and late Christmas gift."

Amanda had a momentary blonde moment, because she was lost in Fraser's beautiful brown eyes. "Alaska?"

Fraser smiled. "No, silly," he said, "the Yukon Territory. Canada."

"Oh," she said, laughing and rolling her beautiful eyes. She blushed. "Of course. I would love that. When do we leave?"

"We'll pack after Christmas. We can go up there for New Year's," Fraser suggested. "Actually, we can probably stay as long as we'd like to. I've got something like about 86 sick days saved up."

"OK," Amanda said, smiling at him. "This is so exciting."

"It is, isn't it?" Fraser asked her.

"Are you excited to be going home?" Amanda asked him.

"Very," Fraser said, "even though it's only briefly."

Amanda smiled. "I love you, Fraser," she said. "Merry Christmas."

"I love you, too, Amanda. Merry Christmas," Fraser said, looking down at her, as they began to dance again. "And how many times must I ask you to call me Ben? You don't have to always be calling me Fraser, remember."

Amanda blushed. "Oh, right," she said. "Sorry, Ben. Bad habit, I guess."

Ben smiled and twirled her around. "Thank you, Amanda," he said. "How does it feel?"

Amanda searched for the right word. "Different," she admitted.

Ben smiled. "You'll become more used to it," he said. "Unofficially, I was Fraser, and now I'm Ben. And it takes approximately 21 days to break a habit."

Amanda nodded and smiled. "Now you're Ben," she said.

"Tomorrow, I would like to treat you to ice-skating and"— he smiled at her— "then we are going to look at Christmas lights—"

"— in a limo?" Amanda asked eagerly.

"In a limo," Ben said, smiling. "Would you like that?"

"I can't wait," Amanda said, smiling.

"Then, if you would like, we'll go together to the Chicago Police Department Christmas party," Fraser said.

"Like another date?" Amanda asked.

"Yes," Ben said. "Would you like that?"

"Yes, I'd like that. I can officially meet the rest of your team," Amanda said.

"Good," Ben said. He leaned down and kissed her. "I suppose I should get you home, Cinderella."

Amanda laughed. "I won't turn into a pumpkin, Ben. The girls aren't worried," she said. "They know I'm with you. That's all I need."

Ben smiled. "Me too," he said.

* * *

Vanessa, Kate, and Carmen immediately pounced on Amanda when she walked in the door, after bidding Ben goodnight.

"How was it?" Carmen asked.

"Tell us every detail," Vanessa demanded eagerly.

"Of course, ladies, but can't a girl get into something more comfortable first?" Amanda asked. "Merry Christmas to you, too."

The girls nodded, laughing. Amanda went upstairs and quickly changed and brushed out her hair. It was still curly from the twist she had had it up in. Then, all of them clad in pajamas, they sat down together on the couch and Amanda began to tell them what happened.

"Well, first we went to dinner and I had this amazing monkfish," Amanda began.

"Mandy, we don't wanna hear about what you had to eat," Carmen said. "We wanna hear about the rest of the date. It was your first official Christmas with him, after all!"

"Dinner was part of the date, Carmen," Amanda said.

"OK, but what about it?" Carmen asked. "Did he tell you about himself?"

"Surprisingly, yes, he's not one who openly expresses things about himself," Amanda said. "He told me about his parents and their deaths. His mother sounded like a good person, and it's a shame he knew her for only the short time that he did. He described the North; Canada, I mean. He said— well, he said he sometimes hears and sees his father's ghost, and that helps him solve crimes."

"Ooh," Kate said, "but doesn't that tell you he's not all there mentally?"

"Probably, but don't tell him that, because he said it almost always works," Amanda pointed out. "And I think it's neat, anyway. I believe in magic and miracles and those things to an extent. I mean, come on, his deaf wolf reads lips and sign language. He's extraordinary."

"He's definitely one of a kind," Carmen said. She hugged Amanda. "Anything else of importance happen that we should know about?"

Amanda laughed and rolled her eyes. "Well, when we were dancing, we kissed for real and said we loved each other," she said.

The girls squealed with delight again.

"Excellent," they chorused together.

"So what do you think is next for you two?" Vanessa asked. "Things seem to be getting serious."

"Well, he said... he asked me... to go home with him for New Year's," Amanda said.

"You mean, you're moving out again?" Kate asked.

"No, I mean, he wants me to visit _home _with him— Canada, the North," Amanda emphasized.

None of the girls said anything.

"And I said yes, I would love to," Amanda went on. "But can you imagine what he might do with me up there?" Vanessa giggled and Amanda hit her to shut her up. "Get your mind out of the gutter, silly. I mean dog-sledding and snow-shoeing and hunting and stuff. It sounds like a great way to embarrass myself."

"Yeah, well, you were never a great skier," Carmen noted.

"Thank you, Carmen, I really needed to hear that," Amanda said, frustrated. "And I have no idea how long we'll really be gone, and I'll need to keep up with school."

"Well, Mandy, no matter what happens, just remember," Vanessa said, "what happens in Canada—"

"— stays in Canada," they said together, laughing.

Amanda's cell phone rang and she picked it up, knowing it was Ben by the ringtone ("Maple Leaf Rag", by Scott Joplin. It wasn't a Canadian tune, but the maple leaf was generally associated with Canadians, so it stuck for his ringtone.) "Hey, Ben, what's up? Yes, I'm at home. Are you OK? Oh, really, Ray needs a date? And Huey and Louis, too? Sure, just let me ask them." She covered the mouth piece with her hand and looked at the girls. "You three wanna take Huey, Louis, and Ray to the Christmas party tomorrow? They need dates."

The girls looked at each other, then nodded.

Amanda spoke again to Ben. "Sure, Ben, they're up for it, but would you mind if I suggest pairings? OK, thanks. Put Vanessa with Ray, Kate with Huey, and Carmen with Louis." Amanda winked reassuringly at the girls. "Ok, great. See you at six. Bye."

She hung up and Carmen said, "Explanation, please?"

"Three guys Ben works with, Huey, Louis, and Ray, they need dates to the Christmas party tomorrow. I told Ben you three are up for it," Amanda said. She looked at them. "So do you guys wanna go?"

"Yeah, totally," the girls said together.

"Great, it's settled, then," Amanda said.

"Now let's open presents, huh?" Kate asked eagerly. The girls laughed and went to open presents.

* * *

"So did you have fun?" Ben asked Amanda, as they walked to their awaiting taxi. Ben held open the door for her and she slid in.

"I did," Amanda said. "Huey and Louis are really nice. Kate and Carmen seemed to have a great time with them, from what I saw."

Ben nodded. "And Ray?" he asked.

"Um... he and Ness will take some getting used to," Amanda said awkwardly. "She and Ray hit it off surprisingly quickly."

Ben nodded. "Yes, they did," he agreed. "So are you ready to go ice-skating?"

"I, uh, Ben, I can't skate," Amanda admitted sheepishly. She looked down. "I'm sorry, I should have told you sooner. That was inconsiderate of me."

"Oh," Ben said, "oh dear. Well, what should we do instead?"

Amanda smiled. "Um... well, my only suggestion is bringing everyone else along to look at Christmas lights with us," she said. "I mean, it might be a little squished, but we can fit in six more people, can't we? Even Francesca can come, if she wants."

"That sounds wonderful," Fraser said, kissing her. "You are brilliant, you know that?"

Amanda smiled. "Part of being a theatre person," Amanda said, smiling back at him. "I love you, Ben."

"I love you, too, Amanda," Ben said, kissing her again.

* * *

"You're going _where_?"

Ray's disbelieving voice cut through Ben's conscience, as he broke the news of the pending Canada trip with Amanda.

"North, Ray, to the Yukon Territory. I'm taking Amanda with me," Ben said to him. He was confused as to why Ray was reacting the way he was. He thought he had it well planned out and those who had to be told of his departure knew, so what really was the problem?

"I see. You're taking Amanda home with you," Ray said, raising his eyebrows.

Ben nodded. "Essentially, yes," he said. "We think it's time I showed her my home."

Ray nodded. "Well, Benny, did you tell the Lieutenant?" he asked.

"Yes, at the Christmas party," Ben said.

"You're leaving the country and I'm the last one you tell?" Ray asked, outraged.

"Well, no, the second. Only you and he have to know," Ben said. "We'll be back by the second of January. There's no reason to overreact. I know it's sudden, but..."

"Benny, you're _never _this impulsive, at least not off the job," Ray pointed out.

"I know, but... I love her, Ray," Ben said.

"Of course," he said, shaking his head.

Ben smiled. "I'll take lots of pictures and bring lots of stories back," he said. "That is, if my film doesn't freeze first."

"OK, but not Inuit stories, Ben, please, OK?" Ray asked.

"No, Ray, no Inuit stories."

This is the end of chapter 5. Finally updated!! I guess you readers can consider this a Christmas gift from me, and just on time! Just to clarify, the reason she has started calling Fraser 'Ben' is because their relationship is more serious, and it made sense to me for that to happen. They became official and more informal that way; thus, narration changed from 'Fraser' to 'Ben' as well, just so you know.

Again, my sincerest apologies for not posting something up sooner. But especially with this story, I don't want to force anything, because if I do, it won't come out right. Honestly, I don't like the ending to this chapter, but it was the best I could come up with. Next chapter, I'm guessing, will be Ben and Amanda's trip to Canada. It may be quite intense, with what I have in my mind at the moment.

I'll update as soon as I can. Thank you to my readers for being patient while waiting for updates. Especially with the next chapter, your patience will hopefully be rewarded. As always, don't forget to review. I love feedback. Thank you kindly.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year, everybody. Stay safe and warm, my lovelies!!

Renthead07


	6. The Wild

Here is chapter 6, The Wild. It is most of Amanda and Ben's trip to Canada, although Reader's-Digested, because I didn't want to drag it out. I hope that's OK and that you guys like what you get. I've taken a small liberty with the cabin. You guys will like the ending. I've wanted to get to the end of this chapter for forever, and I finally did! Here is chapter 6, with some references to episodes "Pilot", "Victoria's Secret", and possibly "Mask" and a couple others that I can't remember at the moment. Chapter 7 may be the epilogue, depending how long the document turns out to be. We'll see. Enjoy.

**Chapter 6 – The Wild**

The vast whiteness of the Yukon Territories extended as far as Amanda could see. The reflection of the sun off the snow nearly blinded her, thus she was wearing sunglasses, until she got used to it.

She leaned over and yelled over the deafening noise of the plane at Ben, "Now what?"

"Now we tell this guy he can go," Ben said, and he signaled to the pilot to take off. The silence that followed was almost as loud as the plane noise had been. Amanda shook her head, trying to stop her ears from ringing. "We put these supplies on the sled for Diefenbaker, you sit on the sled with the supplies, and we mush to the cabin."

"What do we do if we run out of food?" Amanda asked.

"We won't. I made certain of that," Ben said. "But if we have to mush back to the general store in town, we will."

Amanda cocked an eyebrow at him. "General store?" she teased him.

Ben grinned. "Hey, you're in my territory now, remember?" he asked.

Amanda laughed. "Right," she said.

After they went to the general store and picked up the supplies they would need, Amanda situated herself on the sled behind the supplies.

"Are you comfortable?" Ben asked her.

"Yes," she said, smiling at him behind her shawl.

"Good," Ben said, smiling the smile that was saved specifically for her. He looked out at Diefenbaker, who was leading a team they had rented out from town. "OK, guys!"

The sled shot across the snow. Ben reached down and placed a loving hand on Amanda's shoulder. Half an hour later, they crested the hill and approached the cabin.

Ben stepped on the brake and pulled back on the reins. "Whoa, guys." The sled stopped in front of the cabin. Ben hopped off the back of the sled and helped Amanda off. He watched her reaction to the surroundings and the cabin.

She looked around in awe. "It's _so much_," she said.

Ben smiled. "You'll get used to it after a while," he said.

Amanda looked at him curiously. "Am I— are we— going to be able to stay here long enough for me to?" she asked.

Ben laughed and placed his arm around her waist. "We'll see what happens," he said. "The last thing I want is for you to get behind on your schooling, since you've worked so hard to achieve it."

Amanda nodded. "Thank you," she said. "At least I only have a year and a half to go."

Ben nodded and smiled. "Shall we go in?" he asked.

"Yes, please," Amanda said.

The outside of the cabin was blanketed in snow and the interior of the cabin was just as quaint and beautiful. A cast-iron wood-burning stove with a cast-iron teapot stood in the center of the small kitchen, and there was also a living room to their right, and two bedrooms and an adjoining bathroom to their left.

"It's very nice, Ben," Amanda said, looking at him.

"Thank you," Ben said. "It's not much, I'm afraid... but it's home. I had the bathroom added a couple years ago. It was rather inconvenient to go without it."

Amanda nodded. "And you were excited to show me," she said, smiling.

"Yes, I was," Ben said, smiling back at her. "Diefenbaker will sleep by the stove while we're here, so you will be quite comfortable in the second bedroom."

"I'm sure I will. Thank you," Amanda said.

Amanda sat down on the couch in the living room and Fraser got a fire going.

"I will never be accused of arson," Amanda commented, while she watched him start the fire.

Ben looked around curiously. "Why not?" he asked.

Amanda rolled her eyes and blushed. "My dad has a wood-burning stove quite like that at home in Louisville," she said. "I was always scared I'd get burned and I always let the fire get too low before putting more wood in, so it died quite frequently."

Ben couldn't help himself; he laughed.

Amanda blushed and hit him on the arm. "You're laughing!" she said.

Ben stopped laughing and quickly rearranged his expression. "Sorry," he said, "but it's really not that hard."

"Can you teach me?" Amanda asked.

"Certainly," Ben said. "I'll have to teach you later, though, once the fire goes completely out; maybe tomorrow. We have enough wood around back for a few years."

"OK," Amanda said. She went over to him and wrapped her arms around him, as he finished stoking the fire and closed the stove door. With her arms still wrapped around his shoulders, Ben stood up and walked over to the couch. He spun around once playfully before coming crashing back down onto the couch.

"Ah, Fraser!" Amanda yelled, laughing happily. They both wrapped their arms around each other and Amanda leaned up and kissed Ben deeply.

After they parted, Ben asked, "What would you like to do? Stay in and stay warm or go out and do something fun?"

"Well, I really like the idea of staying in and stay warm with you," Amanda said, snuggling up next to him, "but if you would like to go out and do something fun, we can."

"We'll let the fire die down some, then we'll go do something," Ben said.

"OK," Amanda said. She snuggled more up against him and Diefenbaker came over and laid down in front of them.

Amanda didn't realized she'd fallen asleep until she felt strong arms carry her into the second bedroom.

As Ben pulled the covers up to her chest, she opened her eyes halfway and murmured, "Did I fall asleep?"

"Yes. Don't worry, it was quite companionable," Ben said, smiling down at her. "You're tired from the trip. Just sleep, sweetheart. We'll do something exciting in the morning."

"OK," Amanda said. "Goodnight, Ben. I love you."

"I love you, too, Amanda. Sweet dreams," Ben said, remembering something she'd said weeks previously. He smiled down at her, then left the room.

* * *

The next morning, Amanda woke up to her bedroom door opening. Ben walked in with his back to her, carrying a tray of food and drink.

"Ben, what's this?" she asked.

Ben smiled. "I brought you breakfast in bed," he said. "I hope you like caribou patty."

"I've never had it," Amanda said, giving him a bewildered expression. "But if it's anything like hamburger, then I'm sure I'll love it."

Ben smiled. "There is also hash browns and scrambled eggs. I hope you like it. It's the first time I've had to cook for company in quite some time."

Amanda nodded and took a bite. "It's great," she said, looking at him.

Ben smiled. He sat down in the chair by her desk. "I'm glad you like it," he said. "Eat up. We have a busy day ahead of us."

"Oh, we do, do we?" Amanda asked, smiling at him.

Ben nodded. "I'd like to show you the pond behind the cabin. We can ice-skate. I have quite a collection of skates from my father getting me new pairs over the years; one's bound to fit you."

Amanda nodded. "OK," she said. "But Ben, you should know, I've never skated before."

"Not once?" Ben asked.

"Not a stride," Amanda said. She suddenly looked nervous.

"Well, then we'll have to teach you, won't we?" Ben said.

Amanda nodded. "Sure," she said. "I might be bad at it."

Ben shook his head. "That's impossible," he said.

Amanda smiled. "I'm glad you have confidence in me," she said.

"Why shouldn't I?" Ben asked.

Amanda shrugged.

She finished eating and went out with him to the entryway. Ben went to the closet and pulled out a pair of snow pants, just about Amanda's size.

"Whose were these?" Amanda asked him.

"My sister, Maggie's, I'm guessing," Ben replied, "or else my mother's."

"Oh, Ben, you don't have to let me borrow those, if they're... special to you," Amanda said awkwardly.

"It's all right," Ben said, shaking his head. "I trust you. Besides, I won't have you going out to skate in just jeans. You'll freeze out there."

Amanda nodded. "I suppose you're right," she said. She pulled the snow pants over her jeans.

"And your parka," Ben said, handing her a heavy, medium-sized brown parka from his closet.

"Ben," Amanda said, looking at him, "I feel... weird borrowing all these things from your mom."

"Why? I think she would consider it an honor. She would be happy I'm happy with you," Ben said. "My father, at least, seemed to think of me as incapable of loving... love-shy or something."

Amanda was surprised. "That's not very nice," she said. She pulled the parka over her sweatshirt. "I'm glad you're happy with me. I'm happy with you, too."

Ben smiled and leaned down and kissed her swiftly, as she pulled on her gloves and hat. "I think you're ready," he said, giving her a once-over and a look of approval.

"What about you?" Amanda asked, looking at him.

"I'll only be a minute," Ben said. "Go on out; take Diefenbaker with you. I'll be there shortly. Make sure he's looking at you and say 'pond', he'll show you where it is."

Amanda nodded, opened the door, and went outside. "Come on, Diefenbaker," she called to the wolf.

Diefenbaker barked happily and followed her outside. Ben smiled as he pulled on his parka and followed them outside.

Amanda was racing Diefenbaker around the pond, sliding on her knees on the ice, when Ben came out with two pairs of skates. He watched as she attempted to slide across the ice standing up, lost her balance, and went down. Sprawled out, her momentum slid her around in a circle before stopping. Ben made an instinctive motion to go help her, but when he saw she was laughing, he relaxed.

Diefenbaker licked Amanda's face and she sat up and petted him. She spun around to face Ben.

"Good boy. Hi," she said, grinning at Ben.

"Hi. Come here," Ben said. "I'll help you with your skates."

"Thanks, Ben," Amanda said. She glided over to him, but almost lost her balance. He caught her by the arm and steadied her. "Oops."

They sat down in the snow and Ben helped her lace up her skates. "Are they too tight?" he asked. "They should be snug, to prevent sore ankles, but not tight enough that they cut off circulation."

"No, they're good. Thank you," Amanda said.

Ben nodded and quickly laced up his own skates. They hobbled out to the pond and Ben helped Amanda onto the ice. She wobbled for a few seconds, but steadied after a moment.

"Are you OK now?" Ben asked her, looking down at her.

"Yes," Amanda said.

"Take my hand," Ben said. Amanda slowly moved her hand to take his. "It's OK, Amanda, I won't let you fall."

Amanda smiled and nodded.

"Good," Ben said. "Now, it's just like walking, only you don't walk with these skates on, you glide. And it will be slippery, but just don't let go of my hand. I won't let you fall."

For the first few strides, Amanda was very nervous and wobbly and shaking. But as Ben guided her around the pond, Diefenbaker following, she quickly became more steady and fluid in her motions. She took a deep breath and relaxed. Ben slowly moved from behind her to beside her. They skated together, hand-in-hand, around the pond a few times. Then Ben moved his hand from Amanda's waist to her hand.

"Ben!" Amanda said nervously, momentarily missing Ben's touch.

"It's OK, sweetie, I'm right here," Ben said softly from beside her, caressing Amanda's hand with his fingers.

Amanda smiled and relaxed more, and they continued around the pond.

"Want to race?" Ben asked her, after they had gone around the circle a few times more.

"Not a chance," Amanda said, laughing. She smiled at Ben. "I want to stay right here with you."

"I like that idea," Ben said, smiling.

He moved back to behind Amanda. Careful not to unbalance her, Ben rested his chin on Amanda's shoulder and wrapped his arms around her waist, holding her close, propelling them forward on his skates. Amanda stood very still so they wouldn't fall. She leaned back against his strong, tall frame, very much in love. She felt warm and sleepy and content and very happy, despite the cold. She turned her head back to face Ben for a warm, gentle kiss.

They rounded the corner before parting. Neither was steering now. Suddenly, Amanda's knees wobbled and she and Ben yelled and went crashing down onto the ice, Ben beneath Amanda, both of them laughing.

"Are you OK?" Ben asked Amanda, immediately concerned, laughing at the same time.

"I've never been better," Amanda said, laughing. She grinned at Ben. "Let's do that again."

They both lay there for a moment, laughing. Ben began to play with Amanda's hair, his back freezing cold. Then they got up.

"Are you cold?" Ben asked, noticing Amanda shivering.

Amanda nodded. "Yes," she admitted.

"Let's go back inside and warm up," Ben said. "Then, tonight, I'll show you the Northern Lights."

"I've seen them before, Ben," Amanda said.

"Ah, perhaps, but not from way out here, you haven't," Ben said, in a seductive voice, grinning. "You'll love it, I promise."

Amanda smiled. "I'm sure I will," she said.

* * *

Later that night, Ben looked up from reading a book on the floor and noticed colorful light streaming in the window. He looked over at Amanda, who was reading a book on the couch.

"Amanda," he said, "we should go outside now. We can see the Northern Lights."

Amanda grinned excitedly. "OK," she said. She set her book and hopped down off the couch.

"Get your parka on," Ben said.

Amanda nodded and pulled on her parka. She took Ben's hand and they ran out onto the front porch and out onto the snow. Amanda's mouth fell open in awe.

"I've never seen them like this before," she said, looking up at the Northern Lights filling the sky.

"See, I told you? Pretty, isn't it?" Ben asked.

Amanda nodded. "I mean, in Chicago and back home in Louisville, we saw very faint Northern Lights, but nothing like this," she said. She looked up at Ben. "It's beautiful. Thank you for sharing it with me."

"You're welcome," Ben said, smiling down at her.

Amanda leaned up and kissed him. Ben leaned down and deepened the kiss. Amanda wrapped her arms around his neck, running her fingers through his hair, which, normally so perfect, now mussed easily. He picked her up and she laughed into his kiss, as he carried her back into the cabin, to her bedroom. They collapsed on her bed together, kissing until they could barely breathe. Amanda suddenly wished she didn't need oxygen. Fraser's kisses were warm, light, tender, and had a moment of hesitance to him that left her wanting more each time.

They each playfully took off each other's clothes, until Amanda was left in only her bra and panties. Ben took her bra strap in his teeth and slowly took it down her shoulder and all the off her body, caressing her arm with his lips as he did so. Amanda caressed Ben's chiseled abdominal area with her fingers and took off his boxers. She felt him shudder above her as he removed her panties.

Then he hesitated. Amanda looked at him, concerned.

"Ben, what is it?" she asked him.

Ben's expression cleared and he blinked, as though coming out of a reverie. "Oh... nothing," he said. "I was just... never mind."

"No. What? Tell me. Please?" Amanda asked, sitting up on her elbows.

"I was just thinking... what my father would think," Ben said.

"Your father's dead," Amanda pointed out gently.

"I know that," Ben said, closing his eyes. "It's just, sometimes..." He looked at her. "Do you believe in ghosts? Magic? Anything like that?"

"Not ghosts, but magic, yes, and miracles," Amanda said. "The night you rescued me, you were my miracle."

Ben nodded. "Well... please don't think I'm crazy, but... sometimes my father..." He stopped. "You're going to think I'm crazy."

Amanda shook her head, took his chin in her hand and drew his face closer to hers. "No, really, it's OK. Tell me," she said.

"All right," Ben said resignedly. "My father's ghost speaks to me and helps Ray and I solve crimes."

Amanda nodded. "That's cool," she said.

"You think so?" Ben asked, surprised.

"Yes," Amanda said, "so long as he helped."

"He did," Ben said awkwardly, "usually."

Amanda laughed and lay back on the bed, pulling him down with her. She smothered him with kisses, then he asked the silent question.

"Are you sure?" he asked nervously, his voice a few octaves deeper than normal. "I mean, I don't want to hurt you..."

Amanda nodded. "It's now or never. Don't worry, I've been ready for this for a long time. It's been long enough. It's OK," she said.

Ben nodded, then began to make love to her. He soon discovered how strong she really was, as she rocked her body with his, meeting him thrust for thrust. They alternated kissing each other on opposite lips, alternating domination.

Amanda's arms shook and she felt her body explode as she orgasmed. She couldn't hold back the moans and screams any longer, but they weren't of fright or pain, they were of pleasure.

She felt Ben pause for a moment and she knew he was worried he'd hurt her.

"No! No, Ben, don't stop. It's OK," she cried.

She felt Ben shaking on top of her and felt him orgasming as well. He collapsed on top of her, breathless and exhausted, desperately in love. Neither said anything for several moments; there was no need to.

"I love you, Amanda," Ben said breathlessly.

"I love you, too, Ben," Amanda said to him, gently stroking his hair with her fingers. He rolled off her and lay down next to her in the bed. They both fell asleep in each other's arms and lost all track of time.

Has anyone else been waiting for that, besides me? LOL. As always, don't forget to review. I love feedback. Thank you kindly.

Renthead07


	7. The Brewing Storm

I don't own the _Man From Snowy River, Titanic, _or _Victoria's Secret _quotes and references (and any others you guys catch that I didn't) in this chapter. But it seemed fitting between Amanda and Ben, so I'm borrowing it. Here is chapter 7, The Brewing Storm.

**Chapter 7 – The Brewing Storm**

Over the next several days, Ben spent every moment possible with Amanda. He taught her how to snow-shoe, ski, build a fire, and more.

Two weeks into their vacation, Amanda wanted to go hiking, but Ben was out hunting. They weren't out of food, but Ben being Ben, he wanted to make absolutely certain they would not run out. Amanda debated for several minutes, whether she should go out and find him. Eventually, she decided to.

She wasn't sure how far she'd gone before it started snowing and the wind picked up. She was bundled up in her shawl, mittens, coat, and boots, but still felt the intensely cold wind. She could barely see through the blowing snow and her eyes watering.

Cresting a hill, she accidentally crossed her skis, tripped, and fell, hitting her head on a snow-covered rock. Dazed, she laid there for what seemed like hours, hot, sticky blood flowing from the wound; in reality, it was about 30 minutes. She was getting colder by the minute and shivering. She knew, at least, that she should not go any further, but she also knew she wouldn't be able to find her way back in the storm. She could only hope that Ben would come find her.

* * *

Back at the cabin, Ben arrived from hunting with Diefenbaker and a bull caribou carcass. It immediately bewildered him that Amanda was not in her bedroom or the living room.

"Amanda?" he called, just in case she was in the bathroom and might hear him. He went to her bedroom and looked in it, but she was not there. He also checked the bathroom. Feeling slightly foolish, he called again, "Amanda?"

But she was not there.

Still bewildered, Ben went back to the entryway. He noticed several things were missing: Amanda's boots, parka, mittens, shawl, and skis.

_Oh no, Amanda, you didn't, _he thought anxiously.

The weather was beginning to come in, but Ben knew he had to go out and find her before it got too bad. She wouldn't survive out there without him in the miles of white, dangerous wilderness.

"Dief," he said shortly, and he rushed outside, into the brewing storm.

* * *

Amanda didn't know how long she lay on the snowy ground. But the next time she looked up, she saw she had fallen next to a cave entrance. Her ankle burned with fiery pain when she moved it; she had twisted it when she fell. But she crawled over to the cave entrance and into the cave. It was about twenty feet long and wide enough for a grown man to crawl into. She hoped it wasn't a bear cave. But she didn't have time to hesitate, because then she collapsed.

The next thing she heard was Ben's voice.

"Amanda. Oh, Amanda," he said, his voice shaking.

"Ben..." she whispered hoarsely, her voice weak from lack of use and the cold. "Oh, Ben, I'm so sorry... I was stupid... I went out to look for you..."

"Shh, it's OK," Ben said, kissing her hair. "I saw your things were gone, so I k-knew you'd left. I followed your tracks, but with the new snow continuously coming down, they were faint. I was afraid I wouldn't f-find you in time. Why did you leave? You were very deeply asleep when I left; you didn't miss anything. You should have waited for me to return."

Amanda nodded.

"Talk to me, Amanda. T-talk to me, so I know you're OK," Ben said.

"What do you w-want me to s-say?" Amanda asked weakly.

"S-something, anything," Ben said. "You're so cold, nearly frozen. You're lucky you fell where you did and found this place. I'm glad I f-found you. If I hadn't..."

Amanda vaguely looked around as she felt another presence. "I feel so faint... Diefenbaker..." she croaked, slowly petting the wolf with her cold, stiff fingers.

"Yes, he's here," Ben said. "He will help keep us warmer. Sweetie, you're bleeding. I'm going to put pressure on it to stop the bleeding, but it's going to hurt."

Amanda nodded slowly, then bit her lip as Ben pressed his hand against her head wound and she was nearly overcome with the fiery pain. "Ben," she panted, when he stopped pressing for a moment and the black spots disappeared from her vision, "am I gonna die?"

"No," Ben said firmly. "No, you won't, Amanda. Don't even t-think about that for one second. I won't let you."

Amanda felt Ben shivering and snuggled up closer to him. "You're shivering," she said.

"Don't w-worry... I'll be all right..." Ben said softly. "Why d-did you leave, Amanda? You should have known better than t-to go off into the wilderness without m-me."

"I know," Amanda said. She began to cry. "I'm sorry. It was so stupid. I just wanted to find you."

"Shh, don't cry, your tears will freeze and you'll get colder," Ben said, gently wiping away her tears. "You and I must have just missed each other, or I wouldn't have found you so easily. I'm glad I did, too."

Amanda nodded and cringed as he pressed on her head wound again. "So am I," she said.

"'There is nothing either good or bad', Amanda, 'but thinking it makes it so'," Ben said.

Amanda looked up at him. "You know _Hamlet_," she whispered. He grinned. "That's nice." He propped up his shotgun and wrapped her coat, which he'd grabbed from the cabin entryway, and blocked the entrance. The noise of the storm quieted instantly.

They both lapsed into silence for a few minutes. All Ben could hear was Amanda's heartbeat and he realized he had to keep them both talking somehow.

"Amanda," he said, "you have to k-keep talking. Both you and I do. Just hold on a little longer... Um... tell me... what's y-your f-favorite play?"

"By whom?" Amanda asked. She was shivering uncontrollably and her teeth were chattering. She felt faint from the loss of blood.

"Anyone," Ben said, "Shakespeare or anyone."

"_Hamlet_ and _Macbeth_, w-why?" Amanda asked him.

"Ah, of course, it w-would be tragedies," Ben said, rolling his eyes. But he was smiling. "Tell me your f-favorite quotes."

"'The course of true love d-did never run smooth'," Amanda recited.

"_A Midsummer Night's Dream_," Ben said. "That's one of the best; any o-others?"

"'Angels are bright s-still, though the brightest f-fell'," Amanda stammered.

"_Macbeth_," Ben said.

"That's right, Ben," Amanda said, smiling. "I'm impressed. How about 'Tis an ill cook that c-cannot lick his own f-fingers'?"

"_Romeo and Juliet_," Ben said.

Amanda was quiet again and Ben began to worry. What little of her exposed face he could feel was very cold.

"Amanda, please keep talking," Ben pleaded with her. He took off her mittens. "Forgive me." He stuck her fingers in his mouth to keep them warm.

"I d-don't mind..." Amanda said, through her teeth chattering. "'F-fair is fowl and f-fowl is fair'."

"_Macbeth_ again," Ben said.

"Right," Amanda said. "Um... 'Be not afraid of greatness: some are born great, some achieve greatness, and some have greatness thrust upon them'."

"_Twelfth Night_," Ben said.

"You're well-read, Ben," Amanda noted.

"Thank you," Ben said. "'Love sought is good, but giv'n unsought is better'."

"_Twelfth Night_," Amanda said.

Ben nodded.

The storm raged on for hours. Ben watched the light streaming into their shelter fade as evening fell. Diefenbaker whined. It was getting continuously colder. Ben felt Amanda relax against him and realized she had gone to sleep.

"Amanda, sweetie, I can't let you sleep," he said, after shaking her awake. "If you sleep, love, you'll go to sleep forever. I won't let you."

Diefenbaker whined.

"I love you, Ben," she said quietly.

"No," Ben said, "d-don't say that yet, Amanda. D-don't you say your goodbyes. You're gonna g-get o-out of here and y-you're gonna go on. Y-you're gonna finish school and g-get a good job and make s-something great and successful of your life. Y-you're not gonna die at twenty-five. Y-you're gonna grow old."

"I can't feel my body..." Amanda said. Her voice trembled as the cold worked its way to her heart.

Ben wrapped his arms around her body and held her close, trying to warm her with his own body heat.

"It's going to be OK, Amanda," he said. "Just hold on."

* * *

By the next morning, the storm had passed. Ben took down Amanda's coat from the shelter entrance and sunlight streamed in. Melted snow was dripping from the top of the shelter entrance.

"Amanda," he said, shaking her awake once more, "Amanda."

Amanda stirred and looked up groggily at him. "Hmm?" she asked. "Hi. It's q-quiet."

"The storm has passed," Ben said. "We should leave now, before any other weather comes in. Come on, I'll help you. Diefenbaker, go."

The wolf ran out of the shelter and barked. Ben got up on his knees and helped Amanda crawl out of the shelter. He helped her stand up, but she was weak.

"Let me clear the sled and we'll get you back to the cabin," Ben said.

Amanda nodded. Ben quickly cleared off the snow that had accumulated on the dog sled since he had found Amanda, then he positioned her comfortably on it.

"Will Diefenbaker be able to pull both of us?" Amanda asked.

"He should be just fine," Ben said. "I left in such a hurry to go find you, I didn't have a chance to hook up the team."

A sudden loud crashing noise made them turn around. They both watched as snow above the cave entrance fell, blocking the entrance.

"That's why we got out quickly," Ben said affirmatively. "I could see it was melting and knew something like that would have happened. We would have possibly been trapped if it had collapsed with us in it."

Amanda nodded. "It's so peaceful out here," she said, "but one second, it's beautiful and the next it's trying to kill you."

"Well, that's how it can be up here," Ben said. "You've got to treat the wilderness like a high-spirited horse. Never take it for granted."

"It's the same with people, too," Amanda said.

Ben nodded. Then he gave the command and the sled shot off across the snow, back to the cabin.

* * *

Back at the cabin, Amanda lay down on the couch in the living room. Ben placed a gentle hand on her forehead.

"You're warm," he said. "You have a fever."

"Damn," Amanda said grumpily.

"You just rest. I'll be here when you wake up."

Amanda nodded and slipped off into sleep. Ben sat down in a chair next to her bed and waited.

* * *

A couple hours later, Ben heard a knock on the front door. Amanda's fever was slowly rising, so he didn't want to leave her. But when the pounding continued relentlessly and he heard a voice yelling, he went to answer the door anyway.

It was Ray.

"You _still _don't have a phone up here? After all this time?" he snapped.

Ben rolled his eyes. "Sorry, Ray, but there really was no reason to have one, until..." His voice trailed off.

"Until? Until what?" Ray asked.

Ben bit his lip. "Amanda's sick," he said reluctantly.

"Sick? What'd you do to her?" Ray demanded.

Ben rolled his eyes again. "_I _did nothing to her," he said, frowning. "I went out hunting yesterday, before she woke up, and when she woke up, she went out looking for me and got lost. I was lucky to have found her..."

"Where is she?" Ray asked.

"In the second bedroom," Ben said. Ray immediately walked over to the bedroom and Ben followed. "Now, Ray, please don't disturb her. She's running a fever and needs to rest."

"What happened?" Ray demanded, turning around and rounding on him.

"I already told you, Ray," Ben said. "I went out hunting yesterday and she went out to look for me. She didn't say why. But she got lost and fell and hurt herself, and a storm came up and I went out to find her. I almost didn't; her tracks were faint, but still there. Diefenbaker helped, he smelled her out. She was in a cave about two miles from here. The storm blew up even more and we were snowed in for a day."

"Where?" Ray asked.

"She found a cave, miraculously," Ben said. He shook his head. "She would have died otherwise, exposed to the elements."

"What do we do?" Ray asked. "If she needs medical attention, she has to get back to Chicago; unless you have some Innuit doctor who can treat her?"

Ben shook his head. "No, I'd much rather she be treated at home... er, well, in Chicago. That's why I'm glad you showed up. You can call for a private plane and we can get her back, once she's well enough to travel. Until then, I'll do what I can, but I don't want her traveling yet."

Ray nodded in agreement.

"Would you go into the bathroom, please, and wet down four washcloths with cool water?" Ben asked him.

Ray nodded and went to the bathroom. "When'd you install the john?" he asked, as he wet down the washcloths with water.

"A few months ago, I hired someone to build and install it all for me," Ben said. "I would have done it myself, of course, but I couldn't just take vacation or sick leave for personal renovations."

Ray nodded. "Here," he said, handing the washcloths to Ben.

"Thank you kindly." He placed a washcloth on Amanda's forehead, wrists, and the back of her neck. Amanda shifted away from the washcloths, but Ben held her hand and she stopped moving. "Don't, Amanda, it'll help," he insisted gently to her.

"Can she hear you?" Ray asked Ben.

"I'm guessing so, but she hasn't said anything at all since she lay down," Ben said. "I'm not sure if she can hear me or not. I hope she can."

Ray nodded and pulled a chair next to Ben's in Amanda's room. "She'll pull through, Benny," he said. "But when she's well enough to travel, we really should get her back to Chicago. She can't survive here. Hell, I'll be lucky if I survive two days here. She's made it two weeks, but only because of you."

Ben nodded miserably, his expression disappointed and worried. "I know," he said softly.

This is the end of chapter 7. I'm not going to say what's going to be in the next chapter, which will be the epilogue. Send any guesses my way, if you want. Don't forget to review, please. Thank you kindly.

Renthead07


	8. Going Home and Letting Go

I don't own the chapter title "Letting Go". Paul Haggis and all Due South affiliates do. I'm simply borrowing it. :) But "Going Home" makes the title have a double meaning. Here is the epilogue, Going Home, Letting Go.

**Chapter 8 – Going Home, Letting Go**

The next day, at Chicago Medical Center, Ray knocked on room 114 and went in to see Amanda and Ben.

Ben looked up as he walked in, to see who had arrived.

"Hey," said Ray.

"Hi," Ben replied shortly.

"How's she doing?" Ray asked.

"Better," Ben said, "now that she's here. I owe you for that."

Ray shook his head. "Don't worry about it," he said. "You love her. I only helped."

Ben nodded. "Truly, I do."

"How bad?" Ray asked, pulling a chair up next to Ben, who sat with his hands folded, leaning forward in his chair, never taking his eyes off Amanda.

"Early stage 2 hypothermia," Ben said. "Head laceration and a sprained ankle, from when she fell and hit her head on a rock."

Ray nodded and put a comforting hand on Ben's shoulder. "Hey," he said, "that's not as bad as it could have been."

Ben nodded. "You're right. At least she's alive."

Ray nodded again. "That's right," he said, "all thanks to you, Benny."

Ben nodded silently. "I know," he said grimly.

Ray looked at him, concerned. "What's wrong, Benny?"

Ben closed his eyes and sighed before saying, "I'm no good for her."

"What? What are you talking about?" Ray asked, confused.

"I don't think we—" Ben began, but he cut off. He stood up. "I won't talk about this here."

Ray gave him a confused look. "OK, so, uh, out in the hall?" he asked. Ben nodded and went out to the hall. Ray followed, leaving the door slightly ajar. "What, Benny, spit it out?"

"I'm no good for her," Ben said. No tears shone in his eyes as he spoke, but the sadness on his face was overwhelming.

"Explain?" Ray asked.

"I mean, I love her, Ray, but... I can't stay with her. She almost got killed because of me, being with me."

"Benny, that was an accident. You couldn't have prevented it. It wasn't your fault. You found her and saved her life, not once, but twice."

"She called me her 'miracle'," Ben said, revulsion mingling with the despair in his voice. "Some miracle I turned out to be. With what happened, I can't stay here. I can't risk her life anymore. She may have an adventurous side, but she's still a city girl. She can't go back with me."

"'Go back with you'?" Ray repeated, confused. "You mean you're leaving?"

"Yes, Ray," Ben said, "I'm going to speak to Inspector Thatcher tomorrow and ask to be transferred back to Canada."

Ray gawked at him. "You can't be serious," he said.

"I am perfectly serious. As soon as she gets out of the hospital and goes home tomorrow," Ben said, "I'm going to tell her."

Ray shook his head with disbelief. "I can't believe this," he said. "You're really just gonna leave her like that?"

"Ben?" Amanda's voice drifted through the door. "Ben, is that you?"

Ben, ever loyal to Amanda, despite his self-doubt about his ability to protect her, went in to her, Ray following behind.

"Sorry, Amanda," he said. "Ray just arrived and I was speaking to him." He sat down in the chair next to her bed and took her hands in his.

"No worries," Amanda said. "I'm glad you're here."

Ben nodded, but unlike her, he wasn't smiling.

"What's wrong, Ben?" she asked, looking worried.

Ben immediately rearranged his expression. "Nothing," he said. He changed the subject. "Are you glad you're being released tomorrow?"

Amanda shrugged. "I don't know," she said. "I like being with you, but since I'm here, I might as well go home."

Ben nodded. "It's for the best," he said.

Amanda immediately looked confused. "What do you mean?" she asked.

Ben bit his lip. "I mean, I don't think... continuing our relationship is a good idea," he stammered desperately. "I took you to my home. That was a mistake. I nearly got you killed." He closed his eyes painfully and turned and walked away from her bedside.

"Wh-what do you mean?" Amanda stammered, her eyes welling up with tears. "You're b-breaking up with me? I thought you loved me? We can't be parted. You can't leave me."

"Truly, I do," Ben said, "which is why I will not allow us to continue our relationship so blindly."

"So what, you're saying our love has-has blinded us, clouded our judgment or something?" Amanda stuttered, her eyes lost and confused.

"I'm saying you belong in the city, not the wild, and that I'm deeply sorry for endangering you," Ben said. "So, I'm leaving."

"You're w-what?" she stammered, staring at him in disbelief.

"I'm transferring back to Canada at the end of the week." Ben gave her a pleading look. "I'm so sorry. Please forgive me. It's for your own good. You're safe now."

After giving her a courteous nod, he turned and left the room. Amanda looked pleadingly at Ray. "Ray?"

Ray gave her a sympathetic look. "I'm sorry, Amanda." He shook his head and left the room. As he walked out to the hallway and closed the door behind him, he looked at Ben, who was leaning against the wall, breathing heavily as he listened to Amanda cry. He looked truly heartbroken.

"Benny, wait a second," Ray said, thinking wildly how he could persuade Ben to reconsider.

"No, Ray, don't," Ben said firmly. "Please don't try to persuade me to change my mind. I can't. What's done is done."

Even Ray, who knew no Shakespeare, knew that was the end of it.

* * *

"Tell me you're joking, Fraser," Inspector Margaret Thatcher said disbelievingly.

"Sir, with all due respect, I'm certainly not joking," Ben said, shaking his head once. "I've neglected my duties by letting a personal relationship take over my life, and while enjoyable, it clouded my judgment and I endangered Amanda's life. I will not risk such events happening again, to either her or me. And for that, I am requesting to be transferred out as soon as possible. The end of the week is preferable."

Inspector Thatcher could see Ben had made up his mind long ago and was dead serious. She opened her mouth to protest, but closed it after a moment of deliberating; she had no grounds upon which to argue.

"Very well," she said, flustered. "So, uh, fill out the paperwork and pack your things. You'll be back in Canada by the weekend."

Ben nodded. "Understood," he said. Then he walked out of her office for good.

This is the end of Someone To Watch Over Me. I'm not sure what inspired me the other night to write this, but I think having "Claire De Lune" and "Bella's Lullaby" (from the Twilight movie) on repeat over and over might have had something to do with it. :) Those are two of my favorite songs of all time. :)

I hope the epilogue was satisfactory. I know the previous chapter was pretty dramatic (possibly bordering on melodrama), so I wanted to end it on a slightly quieter note. We don't get to see much more of Amanda's reaction and moving on post-Fraser, because I wanted the chapter to center more around Ben and his decision to leave and go back to Canada for Amanda's own good. I hope that's OK. I don't think I'll ever be able to master the character of Margaret Thatcher like Camilla Scott did, so I made her conversation with Ben brief and to-the-point. After all, both he and the author had made up their minds about him leaving Amanda for her own good and going back to Canada where he belonged. It seemed like the best ending. I never really saw Amanda and Ben pursuing more serious of a relationship than they already had.

I hope you readers have enjoyed this story. I've mostly enjoyed writing it. It's been a long road, what with figuring out dates between Ben and Amanda and coming up with original plot ideas, but I did it. I'm not sure how much future DS writing you'll be seeing from me. I'm extremely busy with my second half of my freshman year, leaving little time to write more than the occasional one-shot. We'll see.

As always, don't forget to review. Thank you kindly especially to vic32, my most faithful reviewer. You have been there, encouraging me to write more and wanting more, from day 1. I appreciate it more than you know. Niente Zero, I know you're around somewhere, it's OK. :) Thank you kindly also for reviewing for me and helping me out along the way.

Renthead07


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